Christian life -- Fiction; Conduct of life -- Fiction; Domestic fiction
I felt unlike myself and feared all would discern my uneasiness. Mr.
Benton had, I knew, a mistaken idea, and his polite attentions were
torture to me; he evidently thought my tears needed his commiseration,
whereas, I was only sorry I had not delivered a forcible speech in
Clara's behalf, and caused him (as I had intended) to realize the
necessity of a change in his conduct toward her. I expected him to be
vexed with me and was willing he should be, if it would relieve Clara.
Now, however, he seemed to feel I was entitled to his sympathy. There
was one thought, however, that gave relief; while he was occupying
himself with me, Clara would not be annoyed. Mother said she had a
basket to send to Aunt Peg, and I volunteered to take it. Mr. Benton
smilingly said:
"Let me accompany you, Miss Minot, it will be quite dark ere you
return."
"I am not afraid, thank you, and it will be moonlight," then thinking
of Clara I added, "still I might encounter an assassin on the road."
This did not help the matter any, and only furthered the mistaken
thought of Mr. Benton; nevertheless for the sake of that dear friend,
for whom I knew I could have borne anything, I had, after all, a secret
delight, in being misunderstood. I was a willing martyr to a just cause,
and we started together.
"Take my arm, Miss Minot."
"Thank you, walking is second nature to me, and very easy," I replied.
After walking a little further he said, "I am very glad of this
opportunity to talk with you, Miss Minot; I fear, from what I gathered
in our talk of this afternoon, your idea of me is one which I would fain
alter--it is not pleasant to feel that one is misjudged--"
"I know that," I interrupted.
--"And especially when the charge is a serious one. I cannot understand
why I was so feared; rude enough I must have seemed, and your first
words gave me a shock; I hardly know now how to explain it, and what I
desire is light. Pray tell me by what act of mine, you came to such an
unwarrantable conclusion."
"It was no act of yours at all. Common sense, I suppose, told me you
would not be foiled if you could help it. All men are selfish."
"Are not women?"
"No, sir," I replied, "they are foolish."
"Excuse the question, but has Mrs. Desmonde complained to you?"
"No, sir," I said quickly--that was a little story and then again it was
not, I reasoned.
"So I must conclude that you feared for the safety of your friend,
reading, as you thought you did, the terrible selfishness of my heart.
"I guess that is about right," I said.
"You admit this as a fact?"
"Yes; before a judge, if you desire," I said.
"That being the case, let me here say from my heart I am not as much in
love with Mrs. Desmonde as I might be, and one reason is that I find her
more and more enveloped in the strange fancies peculiar, I judge, to
herself alone."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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