The Hawks of Hawk-Hollow: A Tradition of PennsylavaniaBird, Robert Montgomery
History
The Hawks of Hawk-Hollow: A Tradition of Pennsylavania
Bird, Robert Montgomery
Pennsylvania -- History -- Fiction
"Method is the soul of business," cried the doctor, whose spirits
were beginning to rise to a rapture, as business thickened on his
hand, and who now raised himself a tip-toe among his temporary
assistants, like a generalissimo surveying the manoeuvres of his
subordinates on a field of battle, which is perhaps to determine the
destinies of a nation; "there's nothing like method!" he ejaculated.
"Aunt Rachel, scrape me a little lint--there are more scratches to be
filled.--Hah! what! what the devil's the matter?" he cried, as the
trader, groaning with sympathy at the sight, tore away the damp shirt
from the shoulder, and displayed it deformed and shapeless from
luxation. "Bless my soul, what! a dislocation, really, under the
_pectoralis major_, anteriorly luxed! Oh, here's the devil to pay!
Method is the soul of business: but what method is there in having at
once an arm broke, a shoulder disjointed, a head cracked, and to be
half drowned into the bargain? Murdering work, sir! murdering work!
Where the deuce can I clap my pulley? and where the deuce, now I
think of it, am I to get one?"
"A pulley!" exclaimed the trader, with scorn and indignation; "a
pulley to drag a man's arm off! Why, where's your fingers? Come,
doctor, now's the time."
"Method is the soul of business!" exclaimed the physician, waxing
wroth. "Are you a doctor, a surgeon, a gentleman of the profession,
Mr. What-d'-ye-call-'em, that you take it upon you to instruct _me_
what to do? I tell you, sir, a physician is not to be prescribed his
duty, sir; and I allow no man to interfere with me in my practice,
sir!"
The strength of this declaration was increased by its being delivered
in the doctor's natural voice, high and shrill; but it produced
little effect on the obdurate trader.
"Come, doctor," said he, "I know all about these matters of broken
and disjointed bones, from the toe up to the top-knot, having had a
hand in making many of them, as a man who has been an Indian trader,
in war-times, may well say. So take the benefit of my advice; for I
intend to give it."
"Then, sir," said Dr. Merribody, with becoming indignation, "you may
take the matter into your own hands; I wash mine clear of it. I'm not
to be ruled by any ignoramus Indian trader, who, I believe, is no
better than an Indian himself, and blind of an eye into the bargain;
if you are to dictate, you Mr. What-d'-ye-call-'em, I'll have nothing
to do with the case,--if I do I'll be hanged. No, sir! work away
yourself, and kill the patient as soon as you like: he is at death's
door already."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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