Apart from these things, the large room had been left bare of ordinary
furniture, but across the uneven oak boards, never wholly free from
cobweb-like sheets of glittering grey sand, were strips of carpet, for
Penelope had remembered Downing's once telling her that he generally
came and went barefooted in that mysterious Persian dwelling--part
fortress, part palace--to which her thoughts now so often turned with a
strange mingling of dread and longing.
The man for whom all these preparations had been made, after passing
through the heavy wooden door which shut out wind, sand, and spray,
paused a moment and looked about him abstractedly.
Downing had always been curiously sensitive to the spirit and influence
of place, and the oddly-shaped bare room, partly excavated from the
cliff, into which for the moment no sun penetrated, struck him with
sudden chill and gloom. Mrs. Robinson, intently watching him, aware of
every flicker of feeling sweeping over the lean, strongly-accentuated
features, saw the momentary hesitation, the darkening of his face, and
there came over her, also, a feeling of sharp misgiving, a fear that all
was not well with him.
Since they had first looked into one another's eyes, Penelope had never
felt Downing to be so remote from herself as during the brief hours they
had spent together the evening before; and now he still seemed to be
mentally withdrawn, communing apart in a place whither she could not
follow him.
Standing there in the Beach Room, she asked herself whether, after all,
she had not been wrong to compel him to come to Monk's Eype, imprudent
to subject him, and herself, to such an ordeal. Yet, at the time she had
first proposed his coming, she had actually made herself believe that in
this way would be softened the blow she knew herself about to inflict on
those who loved her, and those whose respect she was eager to retain. 'I
want my mother to meet you,' she had said, in answer to a word of
hesitation, even, as she now saw looking back, of repugnance, on
Downing's part, 'for then, later, she will understand, even if she does
not approve, what I am about to do.'
And so at her bidding he had come; and now, this morning, they both
knew, and felt ashamed to know, how completely successful they had been
in concealing the truth from those about them.
That first night, when out of earshot of Lord Wantley and Cecily Wake,
Downing's words, uttered when they had found themselves alone for the
first time for many days, had been: 'I feel like a thief--nay, like a
murderer--here!' And yet, as she had eagerly reminded herself, he had
stolen nothing as yet--that is to say, nothing tangible--only her
heart--the heart which had proved so enigmatical a Will-o'-the-wisp to
many a seeker.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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