The Hesperides & Noble Numbers: Vol. 1 and 2Herrick, Robert
General
The Hesperides & Noble Numbers: Vol. 1 and 2
Herrick, Robert
Poetry
Spokes, when he sees a roasted pig, he swears
Nothing he loves on't but the chaps and ears:
But carve to him the fat flanks, and he shall
Rid these, and those, and part by part eat all.
988. UPON FAUNUS.
We read how Faunus, he the shepherds' god,
His wife to death whipped with a myrtle rod.
The rod, perhaps, was better'd by the name;
But had it been of birch, the death's the same.
989. THE QUINTELL.
Up with the quintell, that the rout,
May fart for joy, as well as shout:
Either's welcome, stink or civit,
If we take it, as they give it.
999. UPON PENNY.
Brown bread Tom Penny eats, and must of right,
Because his stock will not hold out for white.
1013. UPON BUGGINS.
Buggins is drunk all night, all day he sleeps;
This is the level-coil that Buggins keeps.
1027. UPON BOREMAN. EPIG.
Boreman takes toll, cheats, natters, lies; yet Boreman,
For all the devil helps, will be a poor man.
1068. UPON GORGONIUS.
Unto Pastillus rank Gorgonius came
To have a tooth twitched out of's native frame;
Drawn was his tooth, but stank so, that some say,
The barber stopped his nose, and ran away.
1079. UPON GRUBS.
Grubs loves his wife and children, while that they
Can live by love, or else grow fat by play;
But when they call or cry on Grubs for meat,
Instead of bread Grubs gives them stones to eat.
He raves, he rends, and while he thus doth tear,
His wife and children fast to death for fear.
1080. UPON DOLL.
No question but Doll's cheeks would soon roast dry,
Were they not basted by her either eye.
1081. UPON HOG.
Hog has a place i' the' kitchen, and his share,
The flimsy livers and blue gizzards are.
1087. UPON GUT.
Science puffs up, says Gut, when either pease
Make him thus swell, or windy cabbages.
1101. UPON SPUR.
Spur jingles now, and swears by no mean oaths,
He's double honour'd, since he's got gay clothes:
Most like his suit, and all commend the trim;
And thus they praise the sumpter, but not him:
As to the goddess, people did confer
Worship, and not to th' ass that carried her.
1108. UPON RUMP.
Rump is a turn-broach, yet he seldom can
Steal a swoln sop out of a dripping-pan.
1109. UPON SHOPTER.
Old Widow Shopter, whensoe'er she cries,
Lets drip a certain gravy from her eyes.
1110. UPON DEB.
If felt and heard, unseen, thou dost me please;
If seen, thou lik'st me, Deb, in none of these.
1112. UPON CROOT.
One silver spoon shines in the house of Croot;
Who cannot buy or steal a second to't.
1114. UPON FLOOD OR A THANKFUL MAN.
Flood, if he has for him and his a bit,
He says his fore and after grace for it:
If meat he wants, then grace he says to see
His hungry belly borne on legs jail-free.
Thus have, or have not, all alike is good
To this our poor yet ever patient Flood.
1115. UPON PIMP.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
The Hesperides & Noble Numbers: Vol. 1 and 2 — John Shaqi
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