'I know what it is--damn it! It's that Puseyite gang you've taken up
with--you think of nothing but them. As if you couldn't find antics
and petticoats and priests in Manchester--they're everywhere--like
weeds. Wherever there's a dunghill of human credulity they swarm.'
Dora looked proudly at her father, as though disdaining to reply,
gentle creature that she was; then she bent again over her work,
and a couple of tears fell on the seam she was sewing.
Aye, it was true enough. In leaving Leicester, after these two years,
she was leaving what to her had been a spiritual birthplace,--tearing
asunder a new and tender growth of the soul.
This was how it had come about.
On her first arrival in Leicester, in a _milieu_, that is to
say, where at the time 'Gavroche,' as M. Renan calls him--the
street philosopher who is no less certain and no more rational than
the street preacher--reigned supreme, where her Secularist father
and his associates, hot-headed and early representatives of a phase
of thought which has since then found much abler, though hardly
less virulent, expression in such a paper, say, as the 'National
Reformer,' were for ever rending and trampling on all the current
religious images and ideas, Dora shrank into herself more and more.
She had always been a Baptist because her mother was. But in her
deep reaction against her father's associates, the chapel which she
frequented did not now satisfy her. She hungered for she knew not
what, certain fastidious artistic instincts awakening the while in
unexpected ways.
Then one Easter Eve, as she came back from an errand into the
outskirts of the town, she passed a little iron church standing in
a very poor neighbourhood, where, as she knew, a 'Puseyite' curate
in charge officiated, and where a good many disturbances which had
excited the populace had taken place. She went in. The curate, a
long, gaunt figure, of a familiar monkish type, was conducting
'vespers' for the benefit of some twenty hearers, mostly women in
black. The little church was half decorated for Easter, though the
altar had still its Lenten bareness. Something in the ordering of
the place, in its colours, its scents, in the voice of the priest,
in the short address he delivered after the service, dwelling in a
tone of intimate emotion, the tone of the pastor to the souls he
guides and knows, on the preparation needful for the Easter
Eucharist, struck home to Dora. Next day she was present at the
Easter festival. Never had religion spoken so touchingly to her
before as through these hymns, these flowers, this incense, this
Eucharistic ceremonial wherein--being the midday celebration--the
congregation were merely hushed spectators of the most pathetic and
impressive act in the religious symbolism of mankind. In the dark
corner where she had hidden herself, Dora felt the throes of some
new birth within her. In six weeks from that time she had been
admitted, after instruction, to the Anglican communion.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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