The History of Miss Betsy ThoughtlessHaywood, Eliza Fowler
General
The History of Miss Betsy Thoughtless
Haywood, Eliza Fowler
Abused wives -- Fiction; Bildungsromans; Didactic fiction; England -- Fiction; Married women -- Fiction
But, for Heaven's sake, what could induce you to desire a
continuation of a correspondence with me? What did you take me for?
Did you imagine me so blind as not to see into the shameful means
by which you are supported, or so weak as to forfeit all the
reputation and respect I have in the world, merely to comply with
your request? No! your conduct is too bare-faced to give me even
the shadow of an excuse for ever seeing you again: do not,
therefore, go about to varnish over actions, whose foulness will
appear through all the colours you can daub them with. The
friendship I once had for you has already pleaded all that yourself
could urge in your defence; but the cause is too bad, and I must
leave you to the miseries which attend remorse, and which a little
time will infallibly bring on. Heavens! to be a common prostitute!
to earn precarious bread, by being the slave of every man's
licentious will. What is digging in the mines! What is begging!
What is starving, when compared to this! But the idea is too
shocking; modesty shudders at it. I shall drive both that and you
as distant from my thoughts as possible; so, be assured, this is
the last time you will ever hear from the much deceived, and
ill-treated,
B. THOUGHTLESS.'
She was going to seal up the above letter, when a sudden thought coming
into her head, she added, to what she had already wrote, this
postscript.
'P.S. You may perhaps be instigated to answer this, either through
resentment for the reproaches it contains, or through some remains
of modesty, to attempt an apology for the occasion: but I would not
wish you should give yourself that trouble; for, be assured, I
shall read nothing that comes from you, and that whatever you send
will be returned to you again unopened.'
She immediately sent this away by a porter; and, having satisfied the
dictates of her indignation against Miss Forward, she had now done with
her, and resolved to think of her no more; yet was the confusion of her
mind far from being dissipated. 'What will Mr. Trueworth say,' cried she
to herself, 'if ever the ridiculous adventure of last night should reach
his ears, as nothing is more probable than that it may? What will my
brother Frank say, on hearing such a story? What will Mr. Goodman and
Lady Mellasin say? What a triumph for the envious Miss Flora! And what
can I answer for myself, either to my friends or enemies?'
Little care as this young lady had seemed to have taken of her
reputation, it was, notwithstanding, very dear to her. Honour was yet
still more dear; and she could not reflect, that what she had done might
call the one into question, and how near she had been to having the
other irrecoverably lost, without feeling the most bitter agonies: she
was not able to dress, or go down stairs that day; and gave orders to be
denied to whoever should come to visit her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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