“I had a very pretty woman friend who was taking treatment from my
husband. What I endured during her visits is beyond my powers to
describe. I said to myself: ‘She is now taking off her blouse and now
her petticoat. He is now examining, looking at her bosom, and now she
lifts herself upon the examination table, she stretches her limbs
apart....’ I suffered hellish torments. I was convinced that my husband
could not withstand this woman’s charms and would kiss her. I had a
serious quarrel with him; I quarreled with my friend, who turned from me
with indignation. Our marriage relations grew worse on that account. I
tortured my husband so that he had to allow me to watch through a
carefully hidden peep-hole what was going on in the consultation room.
In that manner I convinced myself that my husband was physically true to
me. But even though he swore a thousand times that the women did not
excite him in the least I could not believe him. I stuck to one thing
which I harped on daily: ‘_Give up your specialty._’ Years thus passed
in quarrels and dispute. I have now a married daughter of my own and I
thought to myself that with advancing age my condition would change. But
not at all! It grows worse and I transfer now my jealousy also to my
son-in-law, I am jealous for my daughter. Fortunately, she has no real
reason to feel jealous and laughs at me....
“I am also jealous of my daughter. I would like to preserve her love for
myself only and I begrudge her husband. Although she made an excellent
match, I was not satisfied and treated my son-in-law very unfairly. I
was unhappy over it but could not help it. I have consulted already the
most famous specialists, have been for six weeks under hypnotic
treatment by Prof. X. I have already kept away from my husband for three
months at a stretch,—nothing has helped.”
That is the sufferer’s history. What is the meaning of this jealousy?
The root of this jealousy is a non-conscious homosexuality. She is
jealous of her woman friend because she herself is in love with the
friend. She puts herself in the rôle of the man, the physician, and
concludes that in his position she could not resist the temptation. She
imagines herself in the man’s place; she scrutinizes every woman with
hungry looks. The peep-hole in the consultation room serves on the one
hand the purpose of calming down her jealousy and of giving the poor
husband a few quiet hours; on the other hand it enables her to
participate in everything that is taking place and to gratify her
craving as _voyeuse_. This control is her daily homosexual excitant, the
means through which she rouses the flames of her passion only to still
them afterwards upon her husband.
After the explanation was reached there was a marked improvement in her
condition. The woman saw that her love for the daughter was homosexual
and that this was the reason why she was so jealous of her son-in-law.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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