Our subject feels impelled to think of the woman’s lovers driven thereto
by his homosexual longing. He thinks of them in a roundabout way, so to
speak, through and around the woman. Jealousy enables him to dwell on
the picture of the naked man; he thinks of the _phallus_ of his rival,
compares it with his own; he drinks in the bliss which his beloved must
have tasted through another man; he places himself entirely in the
woman’s rôle, so that, in his fancy, he is the woman. He hates the woman
in himself and transfers that hatred upon his second self, his beloved.
He hates the woman also because she cannot successfully substitute the
man for him. Before that liaison he spent his nights in cafès and wine
rooms in the exclusive company of men. He no longer does that. He does
not leave his beloved alone any more, thus lacking the excitation of
manly company. He tortures his mother as he does his beloved whenever he
goes home for a few days. He loves her so dearly that he cannot live
through a day without calling her up from Vienna all the way to Berlin,
where she lives, to talk to her. If he is somewhere where he cannot be
reached by telephone his mother must wire him daily. It is very
interesting how this love of the mother covers the deeper love of the
father. He plays the love of his mother as his trump card against the
father. He flees from the sexual love of the father, while yet he has
been repeatedly conscious of his incest phantasies towards the mother.
He always adds to his mother _Imago_ some kind of a father. He was most
jealous of an attorney, already grey haired and a married man, who
therefore stood as a symbol of the father. He has even gone so far as to
look up that man to demand an explanation from him, thereby making
himself ridiculous. His jealousy was particularly suitable as a means
for his latent sadism to become manifest. It enabled him to dwell on
bloodcurdling phantasies, it made it reasonable for him to injure his
beloved sweetheart, and to justify that insane deed as due to excess of
love. The analysis brought about a distinct improvement in the
situation. He joined again his comrades at the public houses and peace
was seldom disturbed after that.
How difficult it is at times to ferret out the homosexual root of
jealousy in such situations is shown by the next case, in which jealousy
is again masked before the subject’s consciousness.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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