“This water, these woods, these fields,” he went on, “all these are
mine. I never take any care of them, and they are mine all the same.”
And like an act of investiture he laid his hand upon my head, saying:
“They are mine; I give them to you.”
It was a playful, unceremonious presentation. Both of us amused
ourselves with the idea. And yet, in spite of our laughter, I had a
very clear impression that the world did in fact belong to me. I would
no longer consent to have a small, narrow place in the world.
As we were going down from our hilltop we met upon the road a young
woman who lived in a villa in the neighbourhood. She wore a white
gown which left her forearms and neck bare, and on her head was a hat
decorated with red cherries. Her parasol, a little behind her, made an
aureola or background for a face which was as clear cut and delicate
as one of those magnolia flowers in the garden that I loved for their
colour, odour and form as of white birds with outspread wings. Still I
should not have noticed her if grandfather had not stopped, riveted to
the spot with admiration, and exclaimed aloud, “How lovely she is!”
The fair face crimsoned. But the young woman smiled at the too
direct homage. I looked at her then, and so fixedly that I have
never forgotten that vision, not even the cherries. But I made my
reservations. To me she seemed already old, perhaps thirty. That is
an advanced age in the pitiless eyes of a child. Her flower-like
complexion made me think of that avowal of the nightingale from which
one day when I was reading the “Scenes in Animal Life,” I had drawn a
fitful melancholy: _I am in love with the Rose--I strain my throat
all the night long for her, but she sleeps, and hears me not_. And
for the first time, and not without a secret anticipation, I associated
an unknown woman with a yet more unknown love.
After this incident grandfather led me to a wooded slope where we had
never been, and which he had represented to me as without interest when
I proposed it as the object of a walk. We had to cross a little brook
before reaching its foot. On the way he was self-absorbed and said not
a word. At the top he turned to the east and led the way directly to a
pavilion near a farm house but half-hidden in a clearing.
“There it is,” he said.
I understood that he was not speaking to me. This pavilion, one story
above the ground floor, appeared to be in a miserable condition. The
roof lacked slates, a surrounding gallery was rotting away. It must
have been long since abandoned. Grandfather delighted in its ruinous
and uninhabitable condition,--a thing which would have surprised me
more if I had not grown accustomed to his whims.
“So much the better,” he murmured; “there is no one there.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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