The House by the Church-YardLe Fanu, Joseph Sheridan
General
The House by the Church-Yard
Le Fanu, Joseph Sheridan
Country life -- Ireland -- Fiction; Ireland -- Social life and customs -- 18th century -- Fiction
'I--I believe he did, some of it; but I warned him, I did, upon my
honour! Now, tell him, did I not warn you, my dear lieutenant, not to
thwallow,' interposed little Puddock, who began to grow confoundedly
agitated; but Sturk, who rather liked shocking and frightening people,
and had a knack of making bad worse, and an alacrity in waxing savage
without adequate cause, silenced him with--
'I p-pity you, Sir,' and 'pity' shot like a pellet from his lips. 'Why
the deuce will you dabble in medicine, Sir? Do you think it's a thing to
be learnt in an afternoon out of the bottom of an old cookery-book?'
'Cookery-book! excuse me, Dr. Sturk,' replied Puddock offended. 'I'm
given to underthtand, Sir, it's to be found in Culpepper.'
'Culpepper!' said Sturk, viciously. 'Cull-_poison_--you have peppered
him to a purpose, I promise you! How much of it, pray, Sir (to
O'Flaherty,) have you got in your stomach?'
'Tell him, Puddock,' said O'Flaherty, helplessly.
'Only a trifle I assure you,' extenuated Puddock (I need not spell his
lisp), 'in a little muslin bag, about the size of the top joint of a
lady's little finger.'
'Top joint o' the devil!' roared O'Flaherty, bitterly, rousing himself;
'I tell you, Dr. Sturk, it was as big as my thumb, and a miracle it did
not choke me.'
'It may do that job for you yet, Sir,' sneered the doctor with a stern
disgust. 'I dare say you feel pretty hot here?' jerking his finger into
his stomach.
'And--and--and--_what_ is it?--is it--do you think it's anything
--anyways--_dangerous_?' faltered poor O'Flaherty.
'Dangerous!' responded Sturk, with an angry chuckle--indeed, he was
specially vindictive against lay intruders upon the mystery of his
craft; 'why, yes--ha,--ha!--just maybe a little. It's only _poison_,
Sir, deadly, barefaced poison!' he began sardonically, with a grin, and
ended with a black glare and a knock on the table, like an auctioneer's
'gone!'
'There are no less than two--three--_five_ mortal poisons in it,' said
the doctor with emphatic acerbity. 'You and Mr. Puddock will allow
_that's_ rather strong.'
O'Flaherty sat down and looked at Sturk, and wiping his damp face and
forehead, he got up without appearing to know where he was going.
Puddock stood with his hands in his breeches pockets, staring with his
little round eyes on the doctor, I must confess, with a very foolish and
rather guilty vacuity all over his plump face, rigid and speechless, for
three or four seconds; then he put his hand, which did actually tremble,
upon the doctor's arm, and he said, very thickly--
'I feel, Sir, you're right; it is my fault, Sir, I've poisoned him
--merthiful goodneth!--I--I--'
Puddock's address acted for a moment on O'Flaherty. He came up to him
pale and queer, like a somnambulist, and shook his fingers very
cordially with a very cold grasp.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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