“Mr. Rayner. I promised to be in the drawing-room to accompany his
violin at a quarter to seven.”
“Pray don’t let me detain you,” said he between his teeth. “I am sorry
I came at all to disturb you in your meditations upon your late
enjoyment. But, as I shall leave Geldham for the Riviera in two days,
and shall not have another opportunity of seeing you before I go, I
took the liberty of coming round this way to-night to congratulate you
on having become an accomplished coquette. Good-night and good-by,
Miss Christie. I wish you another pleasant evening with Mr. Rayner.”
He shook hands with me, trembling all over with passion, and dashed
away through the plantation before I could find voice to call him
back. I was too utterly miserable to cry; I sank upon my seat, with a
confused sense that all joy and brightness and hope had gone out of my
life, since Laurence had left me angry and unforgiving; but I could
not think. I sat there staring at the pond until Mr. Rayner himself
came out in search of me; and, seeing how unhappy I looked, he very
kindly told me that I was tired and should not play that night; but I
said I would rather; so we went in, and I sat down to the piano, and
he took out his violin.
But the spirit was not in me on this night, and I played the notes
loudly or softly as was marked, without a spark of the fire which is
the soul of music. At last Mrs. Rayner went out of the room. It was to
go and see Haidee; but in my despondent state it flashed through my
mind that it was because my heartless playing was spoiling the music,
and a tear rolled at last down my cheek on to one of my hands. Mr.
Rayner stopped, put down his violin, and said, oh, so kindly--
“What is it, my poor child? I did not mean to make a martyr of you.
But I saw you were in a sad mood, and I thought the music might divert
your thoughts.”
“Oh, it is nothing, Mr. Rayner! Let me go on, please.”
“No, child, I am not so selfish as that. It would hurt me more than
you. Come and sit by the fire, and I’ll bring you Nap to play with.”
Nap was his big retriever. Mr. Rayner drew my arm in his, seated me by
the fire, and left the room; and I dried my eyes, feeling heartily
ashamed of myself. What would he think of a governess who went away on
a short visit, did things that shocked people, and came back and
cried, and could not play, and made herself a burden to everybody? He
came back with Nap at his heels, and a glass and decanter in his hand;
then, sitting down by me, he poured me out some wine and told me to
drink it.
I began apologetically--
“Oh, Mr. Rayner, I am so--”
“Yes, I know. You are so very sorry that you can’t help thinking
Denham Court a livelier place than the Alders, and so very sorry that
you were obliged to leave a lot of nice, bright, amusing people there
to come back to a couple of very worthy, but prosy people who--”
“Oh, no, no, no, Mr. Rayner, not that at all!” said I, alarmed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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