The Humour and Pathos of Anglo-Indian Life: Extracts from his brother's note-book, made by Dr. TicklemoreMayer, J. E.
General
The Humour and Pathos of Anglo-Indian Life: Extracts from his brother's note-book, made by Dr. Ticklemore
Mayer, J. E.
British -- India; India -- Social life and customs
Mrs. B., the Colonel, and Mrs. G. were at this time making themselves
very merry, but their conversation was carried on in so low a tone of
voice that nothing reached Miss Freeman's ears. She was in a melancholy
mood, thinking of the sufferings the young Marquis had undergone, the
enormities of those who had caused them, and whether all or the greater
part of what she had heard was not pure invention; and, finally, that
the Baronet wasn't half so nice as the Marquis. But, then, how could he
be, being only a Baronet?
While she was communing with herself, Mrs. B. returned to her former
seat. As she resumed her place she said: 'And how do you like Sir
Charles, Miss Freeman?'
'Oh, I like him of all things,' replied the young lady, 'only I wish he
would not speak so unkindly of the Marquis.'
'I fancy he only tells you,' replied Mrs. B., 'what is common at all our
public schools, particularly if the boy spoken of does not happen to
understand his syntax (I think they call it) well. But,' continued she,
'I don't perceive that you are making any approach to a more cordial
footing.'
'I wish I could,' returned Miss F., 'but I don't know how to manage it.'
'I am surprised at that,' said Mrs. B., 'since you have been so intimate
with so many titled personages; but I will try if I can't help you.'
'Oh, Mrs. B., if you would I should be so grateful.'
Mrs. B., as soon as she caught his eye, beckoned to Sir Charles. When he
came up to her, she said: 'I thought you were to be in waiting on me,
sir, for this evening; but I find you're a very careless squire.'
'Haven't you elected me for your knight? How, then, can I be a careless
squire? But _mille pardons_,' continued the gentleman, 'I do confess to
a temporary dereliction.'
'Which,' returned Mrs. B., 'if I were not most royally disposed I should
not forgive so readily.'
'I think if I were forgotten so I would not be so merciful,' observed
the young lady.
'Why, what would you do under such circumstances?' asked Sir Charles.
'Would you order the culprit to be shut up in the Tower? or would you
order him to be beheaded at once?'
'Not being a Queen,' returned Miss F., 'I would not resort to such
measures.'
'Then what would you do?' continued the gentleman. 'Would you have a
riband or a silk cord tied to the rover's leg or arm, and fastened by
the other end to your fan or your waistband?'
'No,' replied Miss F., 'I would not do that.'
'No! Then what would you do?'
'I think I know what I would do,' returned Miss F.
'I say,' said Mrs. B., 'for the sake of similarly neglected ladies, do
inform us.'
'Yes,' said Sir Charles, 'it would only be fair to tell.'
'I think,' said Miss F., whispering the words into Mrs. B.'s ear, 'I
would try and retain him by the language of the eyes.'
'Oh,' said Mrs. B., laughing, 'but all ladies may not have such
proficiency in that language as you may possess.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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