The Humour of America: Selected, with an Introduction and Index of American Humorists
General
The Humour of America: Selected, with an Introduction and Index of American Humorists
American wit and humor
Before I had filled the cup he was bounding about me. I believe the glad
welcome of the dog did more to revive Euphemia than the water. He was
delighted to see us, and in a moment up came Pomona, running from the
barn. Her face was radiant too. We felt relieved. Here were two friends
who looked as if they were neither sold nor ruined.
Pomona quickly saw that we were ill at ease, and before I could put a
question to her she divined the cause. Her countenance fell.
“You know,” said she, “you said you wasn’t comin’ till to-morrow. If you
only _had_ come then—I was goin’ to have everything just exactly
right—an’ now you had to climb in——”
And the poor girl looked as if she might cry, which would have been a
wonderful thing for Pomona to do.
“Tell me one thing,” said I. “What about—those taxes?”
“Oh, that’s all right,” she cried. “Don’t think another minute about
that. I’ll tell you all about it soon. But come in first, and I’ll get
you some lunch in a minute.”
We were somewhat relieved by Pomona’s statement that it was “all right”
in regard to the tax-poster, but we were very anxious to know all about
the matter. Pomona, however, gave us little chance to ask her any
questions.
As soon as she had made ready our lunch she asked us, as a particular
favour, to give her three-quarters of an hour to herself, and then, said
she, “I’ll have everything looking just as if it was to-morrow.”
We respected her feelings, for, of course, it was a great disappointment
to her to be taken thus unawares, and we remained in the dining-room
until she appeared, and announced that she was ready for us to go about.
We availed ourselves quickly of the privilege, and Euphemia hurried to
the chicken-yard, while I bent my steps toward the garden and barn. As I
went out I noticed that the rustic chair was in its place, and passing
the pump I looked for the dipper. It was there. I asked Pomona about the
chair, but she did not answer as quickly as was her habit.
“Would you rather,” said she, “hear it altogether, when you come in, or
have it in little bits, head and tail, all of a jumble?”
I called to Euphemia and asked her what she thought, and she was so
anxious to get to her chickens that she said she would much rather wait
and hear it altogether. We found everything in perfect order,—the garden
was even free from weeds, a thing I had not expected. If it had not been
for that cloud on the front fence, I should have been happy enough.
Pomona had said it was all right, but she could not have paid the
taxes—however, I would wait; and I went to the barn.
When Euphemia came in from the poultry-yard, she called me and said she
was in a hurry to hear Pomona’s account of things. So I went in, and we
sat on the side porch, where it was shady, while Pomona, producing some
sheets of foolscap paper, took her seat on the upper step.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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