“‘What did you want with poisoned pills?’ “‘Poisoned! Which way poisoned?’ “‘Why, there’s poison enough in those pills to kill a man! A man! They would kill a horse! What did you want with them?’ “‘I take them,’ said I; ‘my stomach’s out of order.’ “‘But they’re poison!’ “‘Not a bit of it! The Lord forbid! I’ve got into the way of it, little by little, and they do me nothing but good.’ “‘H’m! And who made them?’ “‘The apothecary, my friend.’ “‘Tell me all about it.’ “So I told him all I knew. I said— “‘He promised to bring me the pills at Patrìkyev’s tavern, and he never came; and I don’t know where he went.’ “‘And where’s your apothecary now?’ “‘That,’ said I, ‘is more than I can tell your Excellency.’ “Well, he thought and thought, and he poked and poked over his papers; and then he rang the bell. And presently they brought in a young man; and his Excellency asked me— “‘Is this the gentleman who made your pills?’ “I looked at him, but it was quite a strange man. “‘No, sir,’ said I; ‘I never saw the gentleman in my life.’ And the young man said the same thing. They showed him the pills, and he looked at them, and said— “‘I don’t understand anything about it.’ “So then his Excellency poked and poked over the papers, and then he rang the bell, and whispered with somebody, and then with somebody else, and then he sent away the young man; and at last he said to me— “‘Yes, there’s been a mistake; I hope you will not take it amiss.’ “‘God bless me!’ said I; ‘I’m glad enough to be alive!’ “‘You see,’ said he, ‘it was this way: we’ve got another Làptev, the young man you just saw; and he’s concerned in a very bad business. We thought that he had made those pills. And when the doctors declared that they were poison, we thought of course there might be.... Then, you see, the box was addressed in your name, and so we sent word to have you arrested, ... and those blockheads of gendarmes went and played the very deuce.’ “‘Yes, indeed, your Excellency,’ said I; ‘I shan’t forget it in this life.’ “‘Well, really, you see, it can’t be helped; they’re stupid, ignorant men, and you know yourself what dangerous times we live in nowadays.’ “‘Yes,’ said I, ‘God knows the times are bad enough!’ “Well, so after that I felt a bit encouraged; and I asked him— “‘Please, your honour, where is my apothecary?’ “‘That’s just the very thing I’ve got to find out,’ said he. ‘There seems to have been another mistake made over him.’ And he began telling me about it. ‘There must have been a muddle at the head office.... This young man’s name is Làptev too, and he was to be forwarded on; and it seems that, instead of him, they forwarded on your apothecary.... However, all that will be put straight.’ “‘And what’s to happen to me now,’ said I, ‘if you please?’ “‘You may go.’ “‘Go quite away?’ “‘Wherever you like. It was nothing but an absurd mistake.’”