Historical fiction; Russia -- Social conditions -- 1801-1917 -- Fiction
“Look here, Parfen; if you love her so much, surely you must be anxious
to earn her respect? And if you do so wish, surely you may hope to? I
said just now that I considered it extraordinary that she could still
be ready to marry you. Well, though I cannot yet understand it, I feel
sure she must have some good reason, or she wouldn’t do it. She is sure
of your love; but besides that, she must attribute _something_ else to
you—some good qualities, otherwise the thing would not be. What you
have just said confirms my words. You say yourself that she found it
possible to speak to you quite differently from her usual manner. You
are suspicious, you know, and jealous, therefore when anything annoying
happens to you, you exaggerate its significance. Of course, of course,
she does not think so ill of you as you say. Why, if she did, she would
simply be walking to death by drowning or by the knife, with her eyes
wide open, when she married you. It is impossible! As if anybody would
go to their death deliberately!”
Rogojin listened to the prince’s excited words with a bitter smile. His
conviction was, apparently, unalterable.
“How dreadfully you look at me, Parfen!” said the prince, with a
feeling of dread.
“Water or the knife?” said the latter, at last. “Ha, ha—that’s exactly
why she is going to marry me, because she knows for certain that the
knife awaits her. Prince, can it be that you don’t even yet see what’s
at the root of it all?”
“I don’t understand you.”
“Perhaps he really doesn’t understand me! They do say that you are
a—you know what! She loves another—there, you can understand that much!
Just as I love her, exactly so she loves another man. And that other
man is—do you know who? It’s you. There—you didn’t know that, eh?”
“I?”
“You, you! She has loved you ever since that day, her birthday! Only
she thinks she cannot marry you, because it would be the ruin of you.
‘Everybody knows what sort of a woman I am,’ she says. She told me all
this herself, to my very face! She’s afraid of disgracing and ruining
you, she says, but it doesn’t matter about me. She can marry me all
right! Notice how much consideration she shows for me!”
“But why did she run away to me, and then again from me to—”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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