'Linda proved on that nearer, more delightfully intimate
acquaintanceship with her to be the strangest creature of moods and
caprices that could well be imagined. There seemed always a passionate
desire in her heart to be all, in tenderness and gentleness, that
her lover could wish; to show him how deep and sincere her love and
gratitude were. Yet, though she succeeded in part in that desire, there
were hours when she showed him only petulance; when the beautiful face
was turned to him almost with careless indifference to meet his caress;
when the words he uttered seemed to fall on unheeding ears. Again and
again he left her at night with the miserable feeling that he had
failed in some way to please her; blaming himself always, in that he
was a rough and uncouth fellow, and that her delicacy and sweetness
were things he could not properly meet.
She was always filled with the deepest contrition afterward; was always
a thousand times kinder and gentler to him than she had been before,
so that the misery he had suffered was more than atoned for. On one
memorable occasion, when nothing that he did or said seemed to please
her all day, and when she had scarcely responded to his caress when
they parted under the balcony, she came running after him while he was
sadly walking down the avenue, and cried his name, caught his arm, and
fell breathless upon his breast, weeping. He feared that something had
occurred to startle her, and was beginning eagerly and anxiously to
question her, when she stopped him and poured out all that was in her
self-accusing heart.
"Oh, my dear, my love, don't go from me like this! Why are you always
so kind and good and gentle to me? Why don't you strike me, or laugh at
me, or call me harsh names--anything that should teach me how bad I am
and how shamefully I treat you? Dear heart, I've been horrid to you all
day--won't you tell me that I've been horrid?" She looked up into his
face and gently shook him.
He looked down at her, held her close, and laughed happily. "No, I
couldn't tell you that," he said slowly, "because it wouldn't be true,
'Linda dear. We can't always be alike, you know, and if the world
doesn't go right with you sometimes--well, I suppose that isn't your
fault. You're always a great deal too good to me, much more than I
deserve, and I wouldn't have you different for all the world. Whether
you're glad or sorry, or whether you say the sweetest things to me to
tease me, you're just 'Linda, and that's all I want. You mustn't fret,
dear; you've done nothing that I should call you harsh names for;
there's nothing you could do--now or at any time--that could possibly
be wrong. Don't you understand that? It's just because I love you, and
think there's no one like you in the world, that I think everything you
do is right. I don't seem to be able to say exactly what's in my heart,
but I think you know."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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