The Imported Bridegroom, and Other Stories of the New York GhettoCahan, Abraham
General
The Imported Bridegroom, and Other Stories of the New York Ghetto
Cahan, Abraham
Jews -- New York (State) -- New York -- Fiction; United States -- Emigration and immigration -- Fiction
As has been said, Rouvke was a stranger to the feminine world. He met
a good many members of the gentle sex, but that was exclusively in a
business way. The other peddlers he would often encounter on the
street in company with nicely dressed "yoong laddas," with whom they
loudly spoke in English. He also knew that these fellows attended
dancing academies, balls, and picnics; but to him himself these
entertainments were a _terra incognita_. And sometimes when Rouvke
entered the house of a fellow countryman on business (Rouvke never
visited his fellow countrymen except on business), and there happening
to be an English-speaking young woman, the host said: "Miss
Goldberg--Mr. Friedman; Mr. Friedman--Miss Goldberg," Mr. Friedman
would blush crimson at the transaction, while the sentence, "I'm
pleashed to meech you," which he well knew was then in order, stuck in
his throat and would not budge. This, however, was no common
occurrence, for Rouvke took care to avoid such predicaments. At all
events, he never allowed these things to bother his head.
After a while, however, by the time the peddlers and his townsfolk
estimated his capital in cash at five thousand dollars, and when he
actually had over three thousand dollars in bank deposits and
twenty-five summers behind his back, his heart somehow resumed its old
stretching process. He was at a loss to account for it; but he became
aware that each time he passed by a pretty young woman this stretching
sensation forced him to outrun her, and, making a show of stopping to
look at a window display, to allow his eyes to stray off under the
brim of the fair one's hat.
He gradually became a new sort of Rouvke. Formerly, when he was
subjected to the tortures of an introduction to a "yoong ladda," the
ordeal would result in a mere blush, accompanied by one or two
minutes' violent throbbing. Whereas now, every time a similar accident
befell him, he would, after the calamity was over, hasten to find
himself in front of a looking-glass, and fall to inspecting his
glaring necktie and more particularly the pockmarks on his nose. In
times past he was hardly ever conscious of these traces of smallpox on
his face; now they dwelt in his mind with such pertinacity that one
night he dreamed of seeing a watermelon, which was somehow at the same
time a dog with a huge nose all covered with pocks. And when he awoke
in the morning he felt so sick at heart that he could not relish his
breakfast, and was so dazed all that day that he had a carpet sent to
an Irishwoman who had ordered some satin for a dress.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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