The Ingoldsby Legends; or, Mirth and MarvelsIngoldsby, Thomas
General
The Ingoldsby Legends; or, Mirth and Marvels
Ingoldsby, Thomas
English fiction -- 19th century; English poetry -- 19th century; English wit and humor; Humorous poetry, English
* * * * *
In the succeeding Legend we come nearer home.--Father Ingoldsby is
particular in describing its locality, situate some eight miles from
the Hall--less, if you take the bridle-road by the Church-yard, and
so along the valley by Mr. Fector's Abbey.--In the enumeration of
the various attempts to appropriate the treasure (drawn from a later
source), is omitted one, said to have been undertaken by the worthy
ecclesiastic himself, who, as Mrs. Botherby insinuates, is reported to
have started for Dover, one fine morning, duly furnished with all the
means and appliances of Exorcism.--I cannot learn, however, that the
family was ever enriched by his expedition.
FOOTNOTES:
[52] _Teste_ Messire Iago, a distinguished subaltern in the
Venetian service, _circiter_ A.D. 1580. His Biographer, Mr. William
Shakspeare, a contemporary writer of some note, makes him say "_King_
Stephen," inasmuch as the "worthy peer" subsequently usurped the crown
of England. The anachronism is a pardonable one.--_Mr. Simpkinson of
Bath._
[53]
----Meâ
Virtute me involvo.--HOR.
[54] "Nix my dolly, pals, _Fake_ away!"--words of deep and
mysterious import in the ancient language of Upper Egypt, and recently
inscribed on the sacred standard of Mehemet Ali. They are supposed to
intimate, to the initiated in the art of Abstraction, the absence of
all human observation, and to suggest the propriety of making the best
use of their time--and fingers.
[55] _Vide_ Ingoldsby Legends (First Series), page 139.
THE LAY OF THE OLD WOMAN CLOTHED IN GREY.
A LEGEND OF DOVER.
Once there lived, as I've heard people say,
An "Old Woman clothed in grey,"
So furrow'd with care, So haggard her air,
In her eye such a wild supernatural stare,
That all who espied her Immediately shied her,
And strove to get out of her way.
This fearsome Old Woman was taken ill:
--She sent for the Doctor--he sent her a pill,
And by way of a trial, A two shilling phial
Of green-looking fluid, like lava diluted,
To which I've profess'd an abhorrence most rooted,[56]
One of those draughts they so commonly send us,
Labell'd "_Haustus catharticus, mane sumendus_;"--
She made a wry face, And, without saying Grace,
Toss'd it off like a dram--it improved not her case.
--The Leech came again; He now open'd a vein,
Still the little Old Woman continued in pain.
So her "Medical Man," although loth to distress her,
Conceived it high time that her Father Confessor
Should be sent for to shrive, and assoilzie, and bless her,
That she might not slip out of these troublesome scenes
"Unanneal'd and Unhouseled,"--whatever that means.[57]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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