The Initials: A Story of Modern LifeTautphoeus, Jemima Montgomery, Baroness
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The Initials: A Story of Modern Life
Tautphoeus, Jemima Montgomery, Baroness
Bavaria (Germany) -- Fiction; British -- Germany -- Fiction; Love stories
“You are right—I see—I understand now,” cried Crescenz, with tears in
her eyes: “I ought not to have repeated what you said before Mr.
Hamilton, because he might think, perhaps, you liked him as I do—did, I
mean to say—that is, he might fancy——”
“You tiresome girl, can you not at least be silent?” cried Hildegarde,
stamping with her foot. “Mr. Hamilton may fancy what he pleases, but he
knows that I disliked him from the commencement of our acquaintance, and
if I did begin to think better of him, I have again returned to my first
opinion—he is in no respect better than others; and had he anything to
boast of, I am sure he would do so quite as inconsiderately as Oscar or
anyone else.”
“I _hope_ you are mistaken,” said Hamilton, quietly lighting his
bedchamber candle, “but as I have never been put to the proof, I cannot
answer for myself.”
Crescenz hung her head, and looked uneasily towards her sister, who was
about to reply, when Madame Rosenberg appeared at the door, and they all
prepared to retire for the night. Hamilton did not, as was his usual
custom, linger at the door to continue the interrupted conversation, or
talk some nonsense not adapted for the rational ears of their mother; he
walked quickly to his room, seated himself at the table, and taking out
his journal, was soon employed in writing the events of the day, with
copious reflections. He was angry, very angry with Hildegarde, and yet,
by some strange process of reasoning, he firmly persuaded himself that
not a particle of jealousy was mixed with his just indignation. He began
to suspect that his admiration for her person had induced him to give
her credit for virtues which she did not possess; he was even ready to
allow that he had greatly overrated her in every respect; but still the
idea of her becoming his first love had that day so completely taken
possession of his mind that it would not be banished, and imagining
himself, as a younger son, privileged to fall in and out of love as
often as he pleased, with perfect impunity, he determined at once to
enter the lists, and break a lance with Count Raimund. In England his
position was known; Crescenz had already forced him to be explicit on
the subject, and had, he supposed, informed her sister; he therefore
conceived he had a right to pay to Hildegarde all the attention she
would accept, while her opinion of Count Raimund’s conduct that evening
would, he thought, exonerate him from self-reproach, or future blame on
her part. This was arguing most sophistically, and judging a few
thoughtless words too harshly. He seemed to have forgotten that her
mother had accused her of inordinate family pride, and it was this,
perhaps, alone which had made her blind to her cousin’s faults, and
explained, if it could not excuse, the utterance of opinions so unlike
any that Hamilton had ever heard her express. He recollected, however,
with peculiar complacency, the words which Crescenz had repeated
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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