Violent criticism, attacks, and denunciations, coming either from radicals or conservatives, rarely ruffled the President, if they reached his ears. It must have been in connection with something of this kind, that he once told me this story. “Some years ago,” said he, “a couple of ‘emigrants,’ fresh from the ‘Emerald Isle,’ seeking labor, were making their way toward the West. Coming suddenly, one evening, upon a pond of water, they were greeted with a grand chorus of bull-frogs,--a kind of music they had never before heard. ‘B-a-u-m!’--‘B-a-u-m!’ Overcome with terror, they clutched their ‘shillelahs,’ and crept cautiously forward, straining their eyes in every direction, to catch a glimpse of the enemy; but he was not to be found! At last a happy idea seized the foremost one,--he sprang to his companion and exclaimed, ‘And sure, Jamie! it is my opinion it’s nothing but a “_noise_!”’” On a certain occasion, the President was induced by a committee of gentlemen to examine a newly invented “repeating” gun; the peculiarity of which was, that it prevented the escape of gas. After due inspection, he said: “Well, I believe this really does what it is represented to do. Now have any of you heard of any machine, or invention, for preventing the escape of ‘gas’ from newspaper establishments?” One afternoon he came into the studio, while Mrs. Secretary Welles and a party of friends were viewing the picture. Mrs. Welles said that she “understood from the newspapers that the work was nearly completed; which appeared to be far from the truth.” In reply, I made the common place remark, that the “papers” were not always “_reliable_.” “That is to say, Mrs. Welles,” broke in the President, “they ‘_lie_,’ and then they ‘_re-lie_!’”