The International Monthly, Volume 4, No. 1, August, 1851Various
History
The International Monthly, Volume 4, No. 1, August, 1851
Various
Art, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals; Literature, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals; Science -- History -- Periodicals
Every moment as he lay there and thought, the terrors of the vast
unbounded future grew greater and more awful. The contemplation almost
drove him to frenzy, and he actually made an effort to rise from his
bed, but fell back again with a deep groan. The sound caught the ear
of good Jenny Best, and running in she asked if he wanted any thing.
"Stay with me, stay with me," said the unhappy young man, "I cannot
bear this--it is very terrible--I am dying, Mrs. Best, I am dying."
Mrs. Best shook her head with a melancholy look; but whether from
blunted feelings, from the hard and painful life which they endured,
or from a sense that there is to be compensation somewhere, and that
any change must be for the better, or cannot be much worse than the
life of this earth, or from want of active imagination, the poorer and
less educated classes I have generally remarked view death and all its
accessories with less of awe, if not of dread, than those who have
been surrounded by luxuries, and perhaps have used every effort to
keep the contemplation of the last dread scene afar, till it is
actually forced upon their notice. Her words were homely, and though
intended to comfort did not give much consolation to the dying man.
"Ah well, sir, it is very sad," she said, "to die so young; though
every one must die sooner or later, and it makes but little difference
whether it be now or then. Life is not so long to look back at, sir,
as to look forward to, and when one dies young one is spared many a
thing. I recollect my poor eldest son who is gone, when he lay dying
just like you in that very bed, and I was taking on sadly, he said to
me, 'Mother don't cry so. It's just as well for me to go now when I've
not done much mischief or suffered much sorrow.' He was as good a
young man as ever lived; and so Mr. Dixwell said; for the parson used
to come and see him every day, and that was a great comfort and
consolation to the poor boy."
"Was it?" said John Ayliffe, thoughtfully. "How long did he know he
was dying?"
"Not much above a week, sir," said Mrs. Best; "for till Mr. Dixwell
told him, he always thought he would get better. We knew it a long
time however, for he had been in a decline a year, and his father had
been laying by money for the funeral three months before he died. So
when it was all over we put him by quite comfortable."
"Put him by!" said John Ayliffe.
"Yes, sir, we buried him, I mean," answered Mrs. Best. "That's our way
of talking. But Mr. Dixwell had been to see him long before. He knew
that he was dying, and he wouldn't tell him as long as there was any
hope; for he said it was not necessary--that he had never seen any one
better prepared to meet his Maker than poor Robert, and that it was no
use to disturb him about the matter till it came very near."
"Ah, Dixwell is a wise man and a good man," said John Ayliffe. "I
should very much like to see him."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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