HOW monarchs die is easily explained, For thus upon their tombs it might be chiselled; As long as George the Fourth could reign, he reigned, And then he _mizzled_! MCCIV.--TRUE DIGNITY. P---- had a high respect for the literary character. At a great man's house a stranger stopped that P---- might enter the room before him. "Pass, sir," said the master of the house, "it is only Mr. P----, the author."--"As my rank is mentioned," cried P., "I shall claim the preference"; and accordingly took the lead. MCCV.--HOW TO GET RID OF AN ENEMY. DR. MEAD, calling one day on a gentleman who had been severely afflicted with the gout, found, to his surprise, the disease gone, and the patient rejoicing on his recovery over a bottle of wine. "Ah!" said the doctor, shaking his head, "this Madeira will never do; it is the cause of all your suffering."--"Well, then," rejoined the gay incurable, "fill your glass, for now we have found out _the cause_, the sooner _we get rid of it_ the better." MCCVI.--SEVERE. A LADY asked a sailor whom she met, why a ship was called "_she_." The son of Neptune replied that it was "because the _rigging_ cost more than the hull." MCCVII.--NO SACRIFICE. A LINEN-DRAPER having advertised his stock to be sold under _prime cost_, a neighbor observed that, "It was impossible, as he had never _paid a farthing for it himself_." MCCVIII.--SHARP BOY. A MOTHER admonishing her son (a lad about seven years of age), told him he should never _defer_ till to-morrow what he could do to-day. The little urchin replied, "Then, mother, let's eat the remainder of the plum-pudding _to-night_." MCCIX.--EARLY BIRDS OF PREY. A MERCHANT having been attacked by some thieves at five in the afternoon, said: "Gentlemen, you _open shop early_ to-day." MCCX.--JUDGMENT. JAMES THE SECOND, when Duke of York, made a visit to Milton the poet, and asked him, amongst other things, if he did not think the loss of his sight a _judgment_ upon him for what he had written against his father, Charles the First. Milton answered, "If your Highness think my loss of sight a _judgment_ upon me, what do you think of your father's losing his head?" MCCXI.--ON A LADY WHO WAS PAINTED. IT sounds like paradox,--and yet 'tis true, You're like your picture, though it's not like you. MCCXII.--RATHER A-CURATE. IT is strange that the Church dignitaries, the further they advance in their profession, become the more incorrigible; at least, before they have gone many steps, they may be said to be _past a_ CURE. MCCXIII.--MONEY'S WORTH. A RICH upstart once asked a poor person if he had any idea of the advantages arising from riches. "I believe they give a rogue _an advantage_ over an honest man," was the reply. MCCXIV.--THE RICHMOND HOAX.