one attack he spoke of his father as "An Egyptian influence." This is
plainly the same idea as he put into another form when he remarked that he
would be all right if he could become English. When in his free intervals,
he made it a practice sedulously to cultivate English people.
This undercurrent of rivalry with the father came out in a religious
disguise as well. His first attack when he was for many months interned he
described as a religious mania. By means of identifying himself with Christ
he dramatized both his subjugation and defiance. He went through many
crucifixion experiences; said he was commanded by God. On the other hand he
said Christ was a virgin and retained his virginity in order that he might
discover the secrets of the elders. For this reason he was crucified. The
crudest expression he gave of defiance in a religious form was when he said
"I was two persons in one--God and Jesus Christ. God was damned." The more
constructive tendency was shown by his fasting. This was due to an
experience of some duration when he was translated back to the first
century, was in a convent (sic!) and was tempted by the devil to eat. His
fasting, he claimed, saved the other patients. His most constructive
delusion was that all the churches would come together and then there would
be only one church. During his first attack this was his "prophecy," during
his saner intervals there were endless ramifications of this idea which are
too tedious to recite. It is important to note as evidence of the purely
psychotic character of his ideas that he has never been either religious in
his spirit or in action a propagandist.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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