I made an athlete of myself pacing up and down with The Captive! I honestly think I walked ten or twelve hours some days. I have walked all day to-day, but I do not feel tired. I answered advertisements in the papers. * * * * * --Why are men impolite? I do not believe I could ever learn to speak rudely. * * * * * July 23d. The impossible occupations that I have thought of, in trying to solve my problem! To-day I saw myself a lighthouse-keeper! What does a lighthouse-keeper do, anyway? And could I manage to get such a place where I could be alone by myself? * * * * * --But no, some one would have to attend to the light!-- * * * * * I thought of being a hall-boy. But you are not paid very much.--I said, however, that I would at least get some sort of a place up-town. I could not stand it down in the “business” world. * * * * * God, how horrible it is! All that seething effort--and for what? All this “business”--is it really necessary to the developing of the souls of men? Does each man in that rushing mob need more money yet, to begin developing his soul? * * * * * --Another occupation! I saw myself a lonely hunter, living by a mountain lake, and shooting game for a living! I wonder if that wouldn't be possible. I never shot any game, but I could learn. It would suit me perfectly to sit by a mountain lake and read Greek and watch for ducks. * * * * * July 27th. I was getting down pretty close to the limit again, but I got something to do to-day. I had to take what I could find; it is what would be called a good position, I suppose; I am in a wholesale-paper store. I get twelve dollars, and that is quite something. * * * * * The business of the will is to face the things that come--not any other things. Now I have to drill and discipline myself anew, to learn to save my soul alive in a wholesale-paper store! It is a great, dingy place, full of chaffering, hungry-looking men. They are all desperately serious; it is a great “business house,” I believe; the very atmosphere of it is deadly poison. --Oh bald-headed, grim-visaged senior-partner, that didst gaze at me over black-rimmed spectacles--so I have “an opportunity to rise,” have I? Yes,--I shall rise upon wings of a sapphire sheen, and toss myself up in the wind and shake down showers of golden light into thy wondering eyes, oh bald-headed, grim-visaged senior-partner! * * * * * --It is my business to show samples of paper. I shall learn all about them in a few days, and then I shall go at the Greek. * * * * * July 28th. Whenever I feel weary I run off into a corner and whisper into my ear, “It is done! Be not afraid!” Instantly my heart goes up like swift music.