15. Undone with too much Society yesterday,—You scarse can Conceive my dear Eliza what a poor Soul I am—how I shall be got down to Cox only heaven knows—for I am as weak as a Child—You would not like me the worse for it, Eliza, if you was here—My friends like me, the more,—& Swear I shew more true fortitude & eveness of temper in my Suffering than Seneca, or Socrates—I am, my Bramin,[26] resigned. * * * * * 16. Taken up all day with worldly matters, just as my Eliza was the week before her departure.—breakfasted with Lady Spencer—caught her with the character of y^r. Portrait—caught her passions still more with that of y^rself.—& my Attachment to the most amiable of Beings—drove at night to Ranelagh—staid an hour—returned to my Lodgings, dissatisfied. 17. At Court—every thing in this world seems in Masquerade, but thee dear Woman—and therefore I am sick of all the world but thee—one Evening _so spent_, as the _Saturday’s w^{ch}. preeceeded our Separation—would sicken all the Conversation of the world—I relish no Converse since_—when will the like return?—’tis hidden from us both, for the wisest ends—and the hour will come my Eliza! when We shall be convinced, that every event has been order’d for the best for Us—our fruit is not ripend—the accidents of time & Seasons will ripen every Thing _together_ for Us—a little better to day—or could not have wrote this. dear Bramine rest thy Sweet Soul in peace! * * * * * 18. Laid sleepless all night, with thinking of the many dangers & sufferings, my dear Girl! that thou art exposed to—from the Voiage & thy sad state of health—but I find I must think no more upon them—I have rose wan and trembling with the Havock they have made upon my nerves—’tis death to me to apprehend for you—I must flatter my Imagination, That every Thing goes well with You—Surely no evil can have befallen you—for if it had—I had felt some monitory sympathetic Shock within me, w^{ch}. would have spoke like Revelation.—So farewell to all tormenting _May be’s_ in regard to my Eliza—She is well—she thinks of her Yorick w^{th}. as much Affection and true esteem as ever—and values him as much above the World, as he values his Bramine. * * * * * 19. Packing up, or rather Molly for me, the whole day—tormenting! had not Molly all the time talk’d of poor M^{rs}. Draper—& recounted every Visit She had made me, and every repast she had shared with me—how good a Lady!—How sweet a temper!—how beautiful!—how genteel!—how gentle a Carriage—& how soft & engaging a look!—the poor girl is bewitch’d with us both—infinitely interested in our Story, tho’ She knows nothing of it but from her penetration and Conjectures.—She says however,’tis Impossible not to be in Love with her—In heart-felt truth, Eliza! I’m of Molly’s opinion. * * * * *