The Ladies' Vase; Or, Polite Manual for Young LadiesAmerican lady
Religion
The Ladies' Vase; Or, Polite Manual for Young Ladies
American lady
Etiquette for women; Young women -- Conduct of life
"If I granted your position on the subject of utility," said Mrs. W., "I
am afraid I should prove the world very ungrateful by the remainder of
my argument; which goes, you know, to prove the woman of distinguished
talent less beloved than those who walk the ordinary paths of female
duty. I must take the risk, however; for, of all women in the world,
your women of genius are those I love the least; and I believe, just or
unjust, it is a very common feeling. We are not disposed to love our
superiors in any thing; but least of all, in intellect; one has always
the feeling of playing an equal game, without being sure that no
advantage will be taken of your simplicity. A woman who has the
reputation of talent, is, in this respect, the most unfortunate being on
earth. She stands in society, like a European before a horde of savages,
vainly endeavoring to signify his good intentions. If he approaches
them, they run away; if he recedes, they send their arrows after him.
Every one is afraid to address her, lest they expose to her penetration
their own deficiencies. If she talks, she is supposed to display her
powers; if she holds her tongue, it is attributed to contempt for the
company. I know that talent is often combined with every amiable
quality, and renders the character really the more lovely; but not
therefore the more beloved. It would, if known; but it seldom is known,
because seldom approached near enough to be examined.
"The simple-minded fear what they do not understand; the double-minded
envy what they cannot reach. For my good, simple housewife, every body
loves her who knows her; and nobody, who does not know her, troubles
themselves about her. But place a woman on an eminence, and every body
thinks they are obliged to like or dislike her; and, being too tenacious
to do the one without good reason, they do the other without any reason
at all. Before we can love each other, there must be sympathy,
assimilation, and, if not equality, at least such an approach to it as
may enable us to understand each other. When any one is much superior to
us, our humility shrinks from the proffers of her love, and our pride
revolts from offering her our own. Real talent is always modest, and
fears often to make advances towards affection, lest it should seem, in
doing so, to presume upon itself; but, having rarely the credit of
timidity, this caution is attributable to pride. Your superior woman,
therefore, will not be generally known or beloved by her own sex, among
whom she may have many admirers, but few equals.
"I say nothing of marriage, because I am not speculating upon it for my
child, as upon the chances of a well-played game; but it is certain that
the greater number of men are not highly intellectual, and therefore
could not wisely choose a highly intellectual wife, lest they place
themselves in the condition in which a husband should not be--of mental
inferiority."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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