The lady's mile : $b a novelBraddon, M. E. (Mary Elizabeth)
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The lady's mile : $b a novel
Braddon, M. E. (Mary Elizabeth)
English fiction -- 19th century
She looked up at him with the very expression he had so often imagined,
the pretty air of unconsciousness, in which there was neither
displeasure nor alarm; only an innocent surprise. It seemed to him as
if he had acted this scene a hundred times before, and knew what the
end was to be--so constantly had he acted it in his day-dreams, so
often had he imagined its bitter termination.
"Dangerous for you, trebly dangerous for me, because when you assume
an interest in my work, a pride in my fame, you tempt me beyond my
strength. You tempt me to say that which may make us strangers from
the moment you leave this house to-day. My work and my fame are
yours,--yours to trample under your feet if you please; for you have
only to tell me to-morrow that my art is distasteful to you, and I,
who have been the slave of art for five-and-twenty laborious years,
will never touch a brush again. You have been fatally kind to me during
the past few months, Mrs. Champernowne. You have admitted me to a
friendship which must embitter the remainder of my existence--unless
you are prepared to make that existence unspeakably happy. You must
have expected this--or something like this. You could not imagine that
I could see you day after day, and be with you week after week, without
loving you, as I do love you; as I think only a man of my age and of my
concentrated life can love."
The widow sat with her face turned away from the painter, her eyes
fixed on his picture. The soft folds of her cashmere shawl were
slightly stirred by her hurried breathing, but her attitude was
statuesque as the attitude of Dido herself.
"I am very sorry," she said softly; "very, very sorry."
"Sorry that I love you?"
"I am sorry that you should speak so seriously."
"How would you have me speak? How can you expect that I should be
otherwise than serious? You must know that I love you--you must
know that I have loved you ever since you first admitted me to your
intimacy, ever since you first assumed a friendly interest in my
career. Yours is too sympathetic a nature for the coquette's heartless
ignorance. You could not have been unconscious of such love as mine."
"I never dreamt that you felt so deeply. If--if I fancied sometimes
that you valued my friendship more, far more than it was worth, I
thought you were only like some of my other friends, who are pleased
to think better of me than I deserve to be thought of; friends who
pay me pretty compliments whenever they come to see me, and forget my
existence half an hour after they have left my house. Why should you be
so much more in earnest than they?"
"You are only equivocating with me, Mrs. Champernowne; you must have
known that I was in earnest."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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