The Laughing Mill, and Other StoriesHawthorne, Julian
Philosophy
The Laughing Mill, and Other Stories
Hawthorne, Julian
American fiction -- 19th century
"As I need not tell you, the figure which I was pursuing was visible
only to myself. The street was full of people, there were all the usual
noise, bustle, and gaiety of the city at that hour; but though it passed
through the midst of the crowd, in all the fantastic singularity of its
costume and manner, no one stepped out of its way or turned to gaze
at it. That it should be so terrible a reality to me, and at the same
time so completely non-existent to the rest of the world, affected me
strangely. Here was a new bond of relationship between me and it.
My misery and I were one; but the link which united us was a cap of
invisibility for the demon.
"_I_ was not invisible, however, nor unnoticed. I was conscious that
everyone was staring at me--and no wonder! I must have presented an
odd spectacle, hurrying onward with no apparent object, and with an
expression of face which may well have been startling to behold. But so
long as no attempt was made to stop me, I was indifferent to remark. I
had determined to follow my black friend in the plumed hat, no matter
where the chase might lead me.
"The pace grew quicker and quicker. We went down the Haymarket, and were
now in the throng of the Strand. All the places which I know so well
passed by like remembered dreams. They seemed illusions, and the only
real substance in the world was this Thing that I pursued. The dark
shape continued to glide forward with easy speed, ever and anon giving
me a glimpse of the pallid malignance of its evil visage; but my own
breath was beginning to come hard, and the difficulty of forcing a path
through the press became greater as we neared the heart of the city.
Passing beneath Temple Bar, the spectre stopped a moment and stamped its
foot imperiously, at the same time beckoning to me with an impatient
gesture. I sprang forward, yearning to grapple with it; but it was
gone again, and seemed to flit like a shadow along the sidewalk. Its
merriment, however, now forsook all bounds--it appeared to be in a
ceaseless convulsion of chuckling laughter. We fled onward, but so
absorbed in my pursuit had I now become, that I recollect nothing
distinctly until the tower of St. G----'s came into view. I think a
premonition of what was to occur entered my mind then. The hobgoblin
disappeared--seemingly through the iron railing of the contracted
graveyard which bounds the northern side of the church. I came up to
the railing and looked within. It was sitting on an ancient headstone,
blackened by London smoke and worn by time; it sat with its elbows on
its knees, and its head in its hands. A sombre shadow fell about it,
which the cheerful sunshine could not penetrate; but its awful eyes
emitted a dusky phosphorescent glare, dimly illuminating the leering
features. As I looked, a change came over them--they were now those of a
corpse already mouldering in decay, crumbling into nothingness before my
eyes. The whole figure gradually faded or darkened away: I cannot tell
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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