“Are you sorry to see me?” she asked in turn. Her mind could frame
nothing but these soft little meaningless queries.
The young man seemed in doubt how best to answer this question. He
turned around and looked abstractedly at his desk; then with a slight
detour he walked past her, opened the door, and glanced up and down the
dark stairway. When he had closed the door once more, he turned the key
in the lock, and then, after momentary reflection, concluded to unlock
it again.
“Why, no; why should I be?” he said in a more natural voice, as he
returned and stood beside her. Evidently her amiability was a more
difficult surprise for him to master than her original advent, and he
studied her face with increasing directness of gaze to make sure of it.
“Come and sit down here,” he said, after a few moments of this puzzled
inspection, and resumed his own chair. “I want a good look at you,” he
explained, as he lifted the shade from the lamp.
Jessica felt that she was blushing under this new radiance, and it
required an effort to return his glance. But, when she did so, the
changes in his face and expression which it revealed drove everything
else from her mind. She rose from her chair upon a sudden impulse,
and bent over him at a diffident distance. As she did so, she had the
feeling that this bitterness in which she had encased herself for years
had dropped from her on the instant like a discarded garment.
“Why, Horace, your hair is quite gray!” she said, as if the fact
contained the sublimation of pathos.
“There’s been trouble enough to turn it white twenty times over! You
don’t know what I’ve been through, my girl,” he said, sadly. The
novel sensation of being sympathized with, welcome as it was, greatly
accentuated his sense of deserving compassion.
“I am very sorry,” she said, softly. She had seated herself again, and
was gradually recovering her self-possession. The whole situation was
so remarkable, not to say startling, that she found herself regarding it
from the outside, as if she were not a component part of it. Her pulses
were no longer strongly stirred by its personal phases. Most clear of
all things in her mind was that she was now perfectly independent of
this or any other man. She was her own master, and need ask favors from
nobody. Therefore, if it pleased her to call bygones bygones and make a
friend of Horace--or even to put a bandage across her eyes and cull from
those bygones only the rose leaves and violet blossoms, and make for her
weary soul a bed of these--what or who was to prevent her?
Some inexplicable, unforeseen revulsion of feeling had made him pleasant
in her sight again. There was no doubt about it--she had genuine
satisfaction in sitting here opposite him and looking at him. Had she
so many pleasures, then, that she should throw this unlooked-for boon
deliberately away?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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