Poor -- New York (State) -- New York; Social settlements
This group of twenty-two young men and women, all from homes that would
bar the door to charity, even when suffering, were fairly representative of
the social standard of the better part of the wage-earning world of New
York. Among them was the independent girl, the one who had no desire to be
sought in marriage; she saw the worries of her sisters married to men
having small and uncertain wages; saw the wearing side of motherhood rather
than its joys. She skillfully kept her young men friends as friends,
changing from one to the other as soon as she saw the line of friendship
being crossed. The girl who never won attention till she wooed it was among
them; the girl who was treated discourteously or neglected was one of them.
The girl who was sought for exhibition because she dressed well, yet who
never roused any deeper feeling, was there, for some of the men were very
observant, and had standards of style for the girls they escorted.
[Illustration: THE FOREST OF THE TENEMENTS.]
There was the young man who willfully played with a girl's feelings; the
young man who openly exhibited the love he had awakened, but to which he
did not respond; the girl whose adoration received indifferent treatment,
yet who was never entirely cast aside by the man too selfish to marry. In
that company there was one couple who were sentimental in their actions;
they would sit and hold hands, if permitted, rather than dance. As soon as
it was discovered that their actions were influencing others, they were
given the choice to restrain the expression of their affection in public
completely or resign. The lesson was effectual. When it was seen that one
of the young men was very deeply interested in one of the young women, that
she was only semi-conscious of his interest, yet enjoyed it, while not at
all interested in him, just a few words, pointing out how unkind it was to
permit his interest to develop and how unfair to let him spend money for
her when she never meant to hold any relation but that of friend, changed
her attitude toward him. She made the young man understand her position.
More than that, she gave her lesson to the other girls, and escorts were
changed frequently; groups arranged to go to the theater instead of
couples. As one girl put it, "We don't want any nonsense." Yet several
marriages have occurred among these members, the new homes making centers
of social interest for the others. The babies are objects of deepest
interest to all, and it is a lesson to see the ease and freedom with which
even the young men will hold them. Much is said of the "little mothers,"
but the "little fathers" are as unselfish and devoted a part of the family
life in the tenements as the little mothers. When a great, strong young man
picks up a baby with the ease of a woman, is interested in its ills of the
moment, one is grateful for the hours that, as a child, he spent as nurse;
sees the beauty of strength and tenderness, and the humanizing effect of
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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