It was not raining this morning, when Peter, after passing a very warm
night, heard the bells beginning. A great many bells begin on Sunday
mornings in this part of London, no doubt in any part of London, but
here they seem particularly loud. The boarding-house was in a small
street close to a large English church and a small Roman church; and the
English church had its first Mass at seven, and the Roman church at six,
and each had another an hour later, and bells rang for all. So Peter lay
and listened.
Sometimes he went with Hilary and Peggy to the Roman Mass. That pleased
Peggy, who had hopes of some day converting him. And occasionally he went
alone to the English Mass, and he liked that better, on the whole,
because the little Roman church was rather ugly. Peter didn't think he
would ever join the Roman church, even to please Peggy. It certainly
seemed to him in some ways the most finely expressive of the churches;
but equally certainly it often expressed the wrong things, and (like
all other churches) left whole worlds unexpressed. And so much of its
expression had a crudity.... It kept saying too little and too much,
and jarring.
Anyhow, this morning Peter, who had a headache after his warm night,
lay and heard the bells and thought what a nice day Sunday was, with
no office to go to. Instead, he would take Rhoda on the river in the
morning, and go and see Lucy in the afternoon, and probably have tea
there. When Peter went to see Lucy he always had a faint hope that
Urquhart would perhaps walk in, and that they would all be friendly
and happy together in the old way, for one afternoon. It hadn't happened
yet. Peter hadn't seen Urquhart since they had left Venice, two months
ago. Sunday was his day for going to see Lucy, and it wasn't Urquhart's
day, perhaps because Urquhart was so often away for week-ends; though
last Sunday, indeed, he had just left the Hopes' house when Peter
arrived.
Lucy, when Peter had told her his tale of dishonour two months ago, had
said, half laughing at him, "How _stupid_ of all of you!" She hadn't
realised quite how much it mattered. Lucy judged everything by a queer,
withdrawn standard of her own.
Peter had agreed that it had been exceedingly stupid of all of them.
Once, since then, when he heard that Urquhart had returned and had seen
Lucy, he had asked her, "Does he dislike us all very much? Is he quite
too disgusted to want to see me again?"
Lucy had wrinkled her forehead over it.
"He's not angry," she had said. "You can fancy, can't you?
Merely--merely ..."
"Detached," said Peter, who had more words, and always expressed what
Lucy meant; and she nodded. "Just that, you know." She had looked at him
wistfully, hoping he wasn't minding too horribly much.
"It's _stupid_ of him," she had said, using her favourite adjective, and
had added, dubiously, "Come and meet him sometime. You can't go on like
this; it's too silly."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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