Are you well and happy, and enjoying this beautiful summer? London is, in
one sense, a sort of big prison at this time of year: but still at a wide
open window, with the blue sky opening to me & a soft breeze blowing in &
the Book that is so dear--my life-giving treasure--open on my lap, I have
very happy times. No one hundreds of years hence will find deeper joy in
these poems than I--breathe the fresh, sweet, exhilarating air of them,
bathe in it, drink in what nourishes & delights the whole being, body,
intellect & soul, more than I. Nor could you, when writing them, have
desired to come nearer to a human being & be more to them forever &
forever than you are & will be to me. O I take the hand you stretch out
each day--I put mine into it with a sense of utter fulfilment: I ask
nothing more of time and of eternity but to live and grow up to that
companionship that includes all.
6th. This very morning has come the answer to my question. First I only
saw the Poem--read it so elate--soared with it to joyous heights, said to
myself: "He is so well again, he is able to take the journey into
Massachusetts & speak the kindling words." Then I turned over and my joy
was dashed. My Darling; such patience yet needed along the tedious path!
Oh, it makes me long, with passionate longings, with yearnings I know not
how to bear, to come, to be your loving, cheerful companion, the one to
take such care, to do all for you--to beguile the time, to give you of my
health as you have done to tens of thousands. I do not doubt, either, but
that you will get well. I feel sure, sure, it will be given me to see you;
and perhaps a very slow, gradual recovery is safest--is the only way in
this as in other matters to thoroughness; & a very speedy rally would be
specious, treacherous, in the end, leading you to do what you were not yet
fit for. I believe if I could only make you conscious of the love, the
enfolding love, my heart breathes out toward you it would do you physical
good; many-sided love--Mother's love that cherishes, that delights so in
personal service, that sees in sickness & suffering such dear appeals to
an answering, limitless tenderness--wife's love--ah, you draw that from me
too, resistlessly--I have no choice--comrade's love, so happy in sharing
all, pain, sorrow, toil, effort, enjoyments, thoughts, hopes, aims,
struggles, disappointment, beliefs, aspirations. Child's love, too, that
trusts utterly, confides unquestioningly. Not more spontaneously, & wholly
without effort or volition on my part, does the sunlight flow into my eyes
when I open them in the morning than does the sense of your existence
enter like bright light into my awaking soul. And then I send to you
thoughts--tender, caressing thoughts--that would fain nestle so close--ah,
if you could feel them, take them in, let them lie in your breast, each
morning.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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