Clarinda, may I reckon on your friendship for life? I think I may. Thou
Almighty Preserver of men! thy friendship, which hitherto I have too
much neglected, to secure it shall, all the future days and nights of my
life, be my steady care! The idea of my Clarinda follows--
Hide it, my heart, within that close disguise,
Where, mix'd with God's, her lov'd idea lies.
But I fear that inconstancy, the consequent imperfection of human
weakness. Shall I meet with a friendship that defies years of absence,
and the chances and changes of fortune? Perhaps "such things are;" _one
honest_ man[65a] I have great hopes from that way: but who, except a
romance writer, would think on a _love_ that could promise for life, in
spite of distance, absence, chance, and change; and that, too, with
slender hopes of fruition? For my own part, I can say to myself in both
requisitions, "Thou art the man!" I dare, in cool resolve I dare,
declare myself that friend, and that lover. If womankind is capable of
such things, Clarinda is. I trust that she is; and I feel I shall be
miserable if she is not. There is not one virtue which gives worth, or
one sentiment which does honour to the sex, that she does not possess
superior to any woman I ever saw; her exalted mind, aided a little
perhaps by her situation, is, I think, capable of that nobly-romantic
love-enthusiasm.
May I see you on Wednesday evening, my dear angel? The next Wednesday
again will, I conjecture, be a hated day to us both. I tremble for
censorious remark, for your sake, but, in extraordinary cases, may not
usual and useful precaution be a little dispensed with? Three evenings,
three swift-winged evenings, with pinions of down, are all the past; I
dare not calculate the future. I shall call at Miss Nimmo's to-morrow
evening;'twill be a farewell call.
I have wrote out my last sheet of paper, so I am reduced to my last
half-sheet. What a strange mysterious faculty is that thing called
imagination! We have no ideas almost at all of another world; but I have
often amused myself with visionary schemes of what happiness might be
enjoyed by small alterations--alterations that we can fully enter into,
in this present state of existence. For instance, suppose you and I,
just as we are at present; the same reasoning powers, sentiments, and
even desires; the same fond curiosity for knowledge and remarking
observation in our minds; and imagine our bodies free from pain, and the
necessary supplies for the wants of nature at all times, and easily,
within our reach: imagine further, that we were set free from the laws
of gravitation, which bind us to this globe, and could at pleasure fly,
without inconvenience, through all the yet unconjectured bounds of
creation, what a life of bliss would we lead, in our mutual pursuit of
virtue and knowledge, and our mutual enjoyment of friendship and love!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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