exhibiting his nakedness with all the embroidery, and for letting mankind in general know that he had joined the church, which latter was well enough, seeing that it atoned for numerous bygone backslidings. And as he stood in his boots, nearly two feet taller than the major, it was curious to witness the elongation of the little, rotund figure that stood bowing before him. "I see, sir," spoke the general, whose name was Toadytrip, "that you are a soldier, and belong to the noble profession, in which I flatter myself I have obtained distinction, though it has fallen short of my expectations." The major received the general with becoming courtesy, and after expressing his gratification at meeting so famous a companion in arms, inquired as to the wars he had fought in, and what number of scars he had received. Toadytrip fussed himself into a state of very general self sufficiency, and was at first not a little embarrassed; but at length he replied, that though he had never been in battle, he was ready to serve him with meal or metal in any of his undertakings. They now shook hands, and strengthened their friendship over a little brandy, for the general was an advocate of temperance only when it applied to others. "You must know, sir," said the major, "that I am no scurvy fellow, but a man who has stood the devil knows how much buffeting in politics. I have made eight and twenty speeches, sir, in a month; and it was said of me that no man could better them. And if you would know more of my doings, please refer to my companions in the Mexican War." "Your fame makes that unnecessary. To-morrow I give a tea party, and among the rest of my guests I expect a bishop and a nobleman, who is traveling over the country. They are both honest men, and as jolly fellows as can be found in the land. Honor us with your company, sir, and I warrant you entertainment of no common kind; for there will not be one of the lower order among my guests, and the high promotion you have obtained must, I am sure, be the result of many battles, which my friends will be delighted to hear an account of." The major was delighted with the compliment, but, as will hereafter be shown, was not in a condition to honor the general's tea party with his presence. And the general, having expressed his gratification at this meeting, took his departure, with many bows and assurances of friendship. When he was gone, there came several equally great generals and colonels, though editors of smaller newspapers; several of these promised him the support of their columns in any great undertaking he might embark in. This was especially so with the editors of the Celt, and the Irish Citizen, both of which gentlemen only asked that he would give them a pledge not to form an alliance with the English. In addition to this, they discovered a strong inclination for what was in the bottle, of which the major gave them to drink, and sent them home happy.