The Life and Death of Richard Yea-and-NayHewlett, Maurice
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The Life and Death of Richard Yea-and-Nay
Hewlett, Maurice
Richard I, King of England, 1157-1199 -- Fiction
Overpay is not the word: he drowned the bill. In a hurry for the road,
the innkeeper fretted him. 'Reckoning, landlord!' he cried, with one
foot in the stirrup: 'how the devil am I to reckon half-way up a horse?
Here, reckon yourself, my man, and content you with these.' He threw a
fistful of gold besants on the flags, turned his horse sharply and
cantered out of the yard. 'Colossal man!' gasped the innkeeper. 'King or
devil, but no merchant under the sun.' So the news spread abroad, and
Gunther puffed his cheeks over it. A six-foot-two man, a monstrous
leisurely merchant, who rose not to the lord of a castle and town, who
did not wait for his lordship's humour, but found laughable matter in
his own; who was taller than the Archduke and thought his Grace a dull
dog; who made a Danaë of his landlord! Was this man Jove? Who could
think the Archduke a dull dog except an Emperor, or, perhaps, a great
king? A king: stay now. There were wandering kings abroad. How if
Richard of England had lost his way? Here he slapped his thigh: but this
must be Richard of England--what other king was so tall? And in that
case, O thunder in the sky, he had let slip his Archduke's deadly enemy!
He howled for his lanzknechts, his boots, helmet, great sword; he set
off at once, and riding by forest ways, cut off the merchant in a day
and a night. He ran him to earth in the small wooden inn of a small
wooden village high up in the Carinthian Alps, Blomau by name, which
lies in a forest clearing on the road to Gratz.
King Richard was drinking sour beer in the kitchen, and not liking it.
The lanzknechts surrounded the house; Gunther with two of them behind
him came clattering in. Glad of the diversion, Richard looked up.
'Ha, here is Lord Gunther again,' said he. 'Better than beer.'
'King Richard of England,' said the Austrian, white by nature, heat, and
his feelings, 'I make you my prisoner.'
'So it seems,' replied the King; 'sit down, Gunther. I offer you beer
and a most indifferent cheese.'
But Gunther would by no means sit down in the presence of an anointed
king for one bidding.
'Ah, sire, it is proper that I should stand before you,' he said
huskily, greatly excited.
'It is not at all proper when I tell you to be seated,' returned King
Richard. So Gunther sat down and wiped his head, Richard finished his
beer; and then they went to sleep on the floor. Early in the morning the
prisoner woke up his gaoler.
'Come, Gunther,' he says, 'we had better take the road.'
'I am ready, sire,' says Gunther, manifestly unready. He rose and shook
himself.
'Lead, then,' Richard said.
'I follow you, sire.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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