But when my father read on, and was let into the secret, that when a
child was turned topsy-turvy, which was easy for an operator to do, and
was extracted by the feet; --that instead of the cerebrum being
propelled towards the cerebellum, the cerebellum, on the contrary, was
propelled simply towards the cerebrum, where it could do no manner of
hurt: ----By heavens! cried he, the world is in conspiracy to drive out
what little wit God has given us, ----and the professors of the
obstetric art are lifted into the same conspiracy. --What is it to me
which end of my son comes foremost into the world, provided all goes
right after, and his cerebellum escapes uncrushed?
It is the nature of an hypothesis, when once a man has conceived it,
that it assimilates every thing to itself, as proper nourishment; and,
from the first moment of your begetting it, it generally grows the
stronger by every thing you see, hear, read, or understand. This is of
great use.
When my father was gone with this about a month, there was scarce a
phænomenon of stupidity or of genius, which he could not readily solve
by it; --it accounted for the eldest son being the greatest blockhead in
the family. ----Poor devil, he would say, --he made way for the capacity
of his younger brothers. ----It unriddled the observations of drivellers
and monstrous heads, ----shewing _à priori_, it could not be otherwise,
----unless **** I don’t know what. It wonderfully explained and
accounted for the acumen of the _Asiatic_ genius, and that sprightlier
turn, and a more penetrating intuition of minds, in warmer climates; not
from the loose and common-place solution of a clearer sky, and a more
perpetual sunshine, &c. --which for aught he knew, might as well rarefy
and dilute the faculties of the soul into nothing, by one extreme, --as
they are condensed in colder climates by the other; ----but he traced
the affair up to its spring-head; --shewed that, in warmer climates,
nature had laid a lighter tax upon the fairest parts of the creation;
--their pleasures more; --the necessity of their pains less, insomuch
that the pressure and resistance upon the vertex was so slight, that the
whole organisation of the cerebellum was preserved; ----nay, he did not
believe, in natural births, that so much as a single thread of the
net-work was broke or displaced, ----so that the soul might just act as
she liked.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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