Tho’ my father persisted in not going on with the discourse--yet he could not get my uncle _Toby’s_ smoak-jack out of his head--piqued as he was at first with it; --there was something in the comparison at the bottom, which hit his fancy; for which purpose, resting his elbow upon the table, and reclining the right side of his head upon the palm of his hand----but looking first stedfastly in the fire----he began to commune with himself, and philosophize about it: but his spirits being wore out with the fatigues of investigating new tracts, and the constant exertion of his faculties upon that variety of subjects which had taken their turn in the discourse------the idea of the smoak-jack soon turned all his ideas upside down--so that he fell asleep almost before he knew what he was about. As for my uncle _Toby_, his smoak-jack had not made a dozen revolutions, before he fell asleep also. ----Peace be with them both! ----Dr. _Slop_ is engaged with the midwife and my mother above stairs. ----_Trim_ is busy in turning an old pair of jackboots into a couple of mortars, to be employed in the siege of _Messina_ next summer--and is this instant boring the touch-holes with the point of a hot poker. ----All my heroes are off my hands; --’tis the first time I have had a moment to spare--and I’ll make use of it, and write my preface. THE AUTHOR’S PREFACE No, I’ll not say a word about it----here it is; --in publishing it --I have appealed to the world----and to the world I leave it; --it must speak for itself. All I know of the matter is--when I sat down, my intent was to write a good book; and as far as the tenuity of my understanding would hold out--a wise, aye, and a discreet--taking care only, as I went along, to put into it all the wit and the judgment (be it more or less) which the great Author and Bestower of them had thought fit originally to give me------so that, as your worships see--’tis just as God pleases. Now, _Agelastes_ (speaking dispraisingly) sayeth, That there may be some wit in it, for aught he knows----but no judgment at all. And _Triptolemus_ and _Phutatorius_ agreeing thereto, ask, How is it possible there should? for that wit and judgment in this world never go together; inasmuch as they are two operations differing from each other as wide as east from west ------So, says _Locke_----so are farting and hickuping, say I. But in answer to this, _Didius_ the great church lawyer, in his code _de fartendi et illustrandi fallaciis_, doth maintain and make fully appear, That an illustration is no argument----nor do I maintain the wiping of a looking-glass clean to be a syllogism; ----but you all, may it please your worships, see the better for it------so that the main good these things do is only to clarify the understanding, previous to the application of the argument itself, in order to free it from any little motes, or specks of opacular matter, which, if left swimming therein, might hinder a conception and spoil all.