My uncle TOBY SHANDY, Madam, was a gentleman, who, with the virtues which usually constitute the character of a man of honour and rectitude, ----possessed one in a very eminent degree, which is seldom or never put into the catalogue; and that was a most extreme and unparallel’d modesty of nature; ----though I correct the word nature, for this reason, that I may not prejudge a point which must shortly come to a hearing, and that is, Whether this modesty of his was natural or acquir’d. ----Whichever way my uncle _Toby_ came by it, ’twas nevertheless modesty in the truest sense of it; and that is, Madam, not in regard to words, for he was so unhappy as to have very little choice in them, --but to things; ----and this kind of modesty so possessed him, and it arose to such a height in him, as almost to equal, if such a thing could be, even the modesty of a woman: That female nicety, Madam, and inward cleanliness of mind and fancy, in your sex, which makes you so much the awe of ours. You will imagine, Madam, that my uncle _Toby_ had contracted all this from this very source; --that he had spent a great part of his time in converse with your sex; and that from a thorough knowledge of you, and the force of imitation which such fair examples render irresistible, he had acquired this amiable turn of mind. I wish I could say so, --for unless it was with his sister-in-law, my father’s wife and my mother----my uncle _Toby_ scarce exchanged three words with the sex in as many years; --no, he got it, Madam, by a blow. ----A blow! --Yes, Madam, it was owing to a blow from a stone, broke off by a ball from the parapet of a horn-work at the siege of _Namur_, which struck full upon my uncle _Toby’s_ groin. --Which way could that effect it? The story of that, Madam, is long and interesting; --but it would be running my history all upon heaps to give it you here. ----’Tis for an episode hereafter; and every circumstance relating to it, in its proper place, shall be faithfully laid before you: --’Till then, it is not in my power to give farther light into this matter, or say more than what I have said already, ----That my uncle _Toby_ was a gentleman of unparallel’d modesty, which happening to be somewhat subtilized and rarified by the constant heat of a little family pride, ----they both so wrought together within him, that he could never bear to hear the affair of my aunt DINAH touch’d upon, but with the greatest emotion. ----The least hint of it was enough to make the blood fly into his face; --but when my father enlarged upon the story in mixed companies, which the illustration of his hypothesis frequently obliged him to do, --the unfortunate blight of one of the fairest branches of the family, would set my uncle _Toby’s_ honour and modesty o’bleeding; and he would often take my father aside, in the greatest concern imaginable, to expostulate and tell him, he would give him anything in the world, only to let the story rest.