“I have another fortnight’s work to bestow upon the Suite. At Brailov I shall be able to give myself up entirely to my increasing love of nature. There is no other spot in the world which can offer me so much in this respect. To live in your house, to feel myself free and alone, to be able to visit the forests every day and wander all day among the flowers, to listen to the nightingale at night, to read your books, play upon your instruments and think of you--these are joys I cannot find elsewhere.” _To P. Jurgenson._ “KAMENKA, _April_ 22_nd_ (_May_ 4_th_), 1879. “I am beginning to be proud of my works, now that I see what an extraordinary effect some of them make. Everyone here is crazy over the Andante, and when I played it with my brother as a pianoforte duet, one girl fainted away (this is a fact!!). To make the fair sex faint is the highest triumph to which any composer can attain.” _To N. F. von Meck._ “BRAILOV, _May_ 5_th_ (17_th_), 1879. “Yesterday I began to study the score of _Lohengrin_. I know you are no great admirer of Wagner, and I, too, am far from being a desperate Wagnerite. I am not very sympathetic to Wagnerism as a principle. Wagner’s personality arouses my antipathy, yet I must do justice to his great musical gift. This reaches its climax in _Lohengrin_, which will always remain the crown of all his works. After _Lohengrin_, began the deterioration of his talent, which was ruined by his diabolical vanity. He lost all sense of proportion, and began to overstep all limits, so that everything he composed after _Lohengrin_ became incomprehensible, impossible music which has no future. What chiefly interests me in _Lohengrin_ at present is the orchestration. In view of the work which lies before me, I want to study this score very closely, and decide whether to adopt some of his methods of instrumentation. His mastery is extraordinary, but, for reasons which would necessitate technical explanations, I have not borrowed anything from him. Wagner’s orchestration is too symphonic, too overloaded and heavy for vocal music. The older I grow, the more convinced I am that symphony and opera are in every respect at the opposite poles of music. Therefore the study of _Lohengrin_ will not lead me to change my style, although it has been interesting and of negative value.” _To N. F. von Meck._ “BRAILOV, _May_ 7_th_ (19_th_), _1879_.