Sir Everard Digby was only allowed two clear days between his trial and
his execution to prepare for death. He was not permitted to see his
young wife or his little sons, nor was he granted the consolation of the
services of a priest. Short as was the time he had yet to live, it must
have hung heavily on his hands. Fortunately he had lived much with
Jesuits, who would doubtless have instructed him in their admirable
system of meditation; but "the exercise of the memory," which it
includes, can hardly have afforded him much consolation under the
circumstances. To add to his depression, it was at the time of year when
there are but few hours of daylight, and the artificial light permitted
in a prisoner's room in the Tower would certainly be very meagre, and
little more than sufficient to render the ghastly gloom of the
dungeon-walls more manifest. Very early, too, all prisoners' lights
would be put out, and terrible then must have been the dreariness of the
long nights and the dark mornings, until the sun rose at about a quarter
to eight o'clock. It is easy to imagine him dreaming of his happy home
at Gothurst, and fancying himself walking with his wife in its garden,
or playing with his little children by its great hall fireside, or
entertaining his guests at its long banquetting-table, and suddenly
waking with a start, to find himself in darkness, on a hard bed, with a
rough, cold wall beside him, and to remember that he was a condemned
traitor in the Tower of London; and then, perhaps, lying awake to
reflect upon the brilliant opportunities of happiness, prosperity, and
usefulness with which he had started in his short life, and the misery
in which he was about to end it. Nor does it require any great effort of
the imagination to see him falling, from sheer weariness, into a fitful,
feverish sleep, and, as he turned and tossed, frequently dreaming of the
horrors of his impending execution, as they had been so lately described
in his presence by the Attorney-General.
When, in the morning, he rose to obtain consolation from devotion, how
likely that the heavy drowsiness or headache resulting from a wretched
night would make him feel utterly helpless as he tried to pray or
meditate; or that, distracted by the memories of his misfortunes, and
the terrible thought of the destitution to which his wife and family
might be exposed--for he seems to have died in doubt whether Gothurst,
as well as his estates inherited from his father, would not be
confiscated--he would be unable to fix his attention upon spiritual
matters.
During the interval preceding his death Sir Everard wrote the following
lines. Criticise them as you please; call them doggrel if you will; but
at least respect them as the words of a broken-hearted and dying man.
* * * * *
JESUS MARIA.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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