The Life of Tolstoy: First Fifty Years: Fifth EditionMaude, Aylmer
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The Life of Tolstoy: First Fifty Years: Fifth Edition
Maude, Aylmer
Tolstoy, Leo, graf, 1828-1910
boy who had been led astray by his comrade, a gifted narrator and
jester, a plump, white, chubby little chap, wept without restraint
and with all his childish might. The other, the chief offender, a
hump-nosed boy with a thin-featured, clever face, became pale, his
lips quivered, his eyes looked wildly and angrily at his joyous
comrades, and occasionally his face was unnaturally distorted by a
sob. His cap, with a torn peak, was stuck on the very back of his
head; his hair was ruffled, his clothes soiled with chalk. All this
now struck me and everybody else as though we saw it for the first
time. The unkindly attention of all was directed to him, and he
felt it painfully. When, with bent head and without looking round,
he started homeward with (as it seemed to me) a peculiar, criminal
gait, and when the boys ran after him in a crowd, teasing him in an
unnatural and strangely cruel way as though, against their will,
they were moved by some evil spirit, something told me that we were
not doing right. But things took their course, and the thief wore
the card that whole day. From this time he began, as it seemed to
me, to learn worse, and one did not see him playing and talking
with his fellows out of class.
One day I came to a lesson, and the pupils informed me, with
a kind of horror, that the boy had again stolen. He had taken
twenty copecks (seven pence) in coppers from the teacher's room,
and had been caught hiding them under the stairs. We again hung
a card on him; and again the same revolting scene recommenced. I
began to admonish him, as all masters admonish; and a big boy,
fond of talking, who was present, also admonished him--probably
repeating words he had heard his father, an innkeeper, use: 'You
steal once, and you do it again,' said he distinctly, glibly, and
with dignity; 'it becomes a habit, and leads to no good.' I began
to get vexed. I glanced at the face of the punished boy, which
had become yet paler, more suffering and harder than before; and
somehow I thought of convicts, and suddenly I felt so ashamed and
disgusted that I tore the stupid card off him, told him to go where
he liked, and became convinced--and convinced not by reason, but by
my whole nature--that I had no right to torment that unfortunate
boy, and that it was not in my power to make of him what I and the
innkeeper's son wanted to make of him. I became convinced that
there are secrets of the soul, hidden from us, on which life may
act, but which precepts and punishments do not reach.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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