DEAR EGGIE,--Many happy returns. I have spent all my dress allowance, so I can't do much in the way of a present, I'm afraid; but I send a P.O. for 2_s._ 6_d._ You got a pretty bad half-term report, my dear. Breakfast that morning _was_ a cheery meal. I got hold of it afterwards and read it, and certainly you seem to have been getting into hot water all round. By the way, I see you have got some new masters at Grandwich, judging by the initials on your report. I know "V. K." and "O. P. H.": they are Killick and Higginson, aren't they? But who are "A. C. N." and "M. P. G."?--Your affec. sister, BARBARA. (_Reply._ _November, 7._ DEAR BABS,--Thanks ever so much for the 2_s._ 6_d._ It is most welcome, as the pater only sent ten bob, being shirty about my report; and the mater another. Still, I haven't heard from Aunt Deborah yet: she usually comes down hansom on my birthday. The new masters you mean are A. C. Newton and M. P. Gainford. I don't think either of them would take very kindly to you. Newton is an International, so he won't have much use for girls. Gainford is rather a snipe, and has been married for years and years. But I'll tell you if any more new ones come. I am making a last effort to get on to the Mods. next term--about fed up with Higgie.--Your affec. brother, E. BUMPLEIGH.) No. IV THE SCHOOL HOUSE, OAKSHOTT SCHOOL, BUCKS, _Monday_. DEAR EGGSTER,--Well, old sport, how goes it? Just remembered it is your birthday, so send you 9_d._ in stamps--all I have but 2_d._ How is your mangy school? Wait till our XV plays you on the 18th! What ho!--Your affec. brother, J. BUMPLEIGH. Just had a letter from the pater about my half-term report. He seems in a fairly rotten state. (_Reply._ _November 7._ DEAR MOPPY,--Thanks awfully for the 9_d._ I am about broke, owing to my half-term report coinsiding with my birthday. Putrid luck, I call it. Still, Aunt Deborah hasn't weighed in yet. All right, send along your bandy-legged XV, and we will return them to you knock-kneed. I must stop now, as we are going to rag a man's study for wearing a dickey.--Your affec. brother, E. BUMPLEIGH.) No. V THE LABURNUMS, SURBITON, _Monday, Nov. 6._