The Little Brown Jug at KildareNicholson, Meredith
General
The Little Brown Jug at Kildare
Nicholson, Meredith
Fathers and daughters -- Fiction; Governors -- Fiction; Humorous stories; North Carolina -- Fiction; South Carolina -- Fiction
"There must be a mistake about this. He wouldn't have used 'diverting'
that way; that's insulting!"
"So you appreciate its significance, do you, Mr. Ardmore? The iron
enters your soul, does it? You realize that I have been insulted, do
you?"
"I shouldn't put it that way, Miss Dangerfield. Governor Osborne would
never have sent a message like that to you--he thought he was sending it
to your father."
"He's insulted me and every other citizen in the Old North State; that's
who he's insulted, Mr. Ardmore. Let me read it again;" and she repeated
the telegram aloud:
"'Your extremely diverting telegram in Appleweight case received and
filed.' I think it's the _extremely_ that's so perfectly mean. The
_diverting_ by itself would not hurt my feelings half so much. He's a
good deal smarter man than I thought he was to think up a telegram like
that. But what do you think of that piece in the newspaper?"
"He says he's going to catch Appleweight dead or alive. That sounds
pretty serious."
"I think it's a bluff myself. That telegram we sent him yesterday must
have scared him to death. He was driven into a corner and had to do
something to avoid being disgraced, and it's easy enough to talk big in
the newspapers when you haven't the slightest intention of doing
anything at all. I've noticed that father talks the longest and loudest
about things he doesn't believe at all."
"Is it possible?" whispered Ardmore incredulously.
"Of course it's possible! Father would never have been elected if he'd
expressed his real sentiments; neither would anybody else ever be
elected if he said beforehand what he really believed."
"That must have been the reason I got defeated for alderman on the
reform ticket. I told 'em I was for turning the rascals out."
"That was very stupid of you. You've got to get the rascals to elect
you first; then if you're tired of office and don't need them any more
you bounce them. But that's political practice; it's a theory we've got
to work out now. Governor Osborne's telegram is much more important than
his interview in the newspapers, which is just for effect and of no
importance at all. He doesn't say the same things in the telegram to
father that he said to the reporter. A governor who really meant to do
anything wouldn't be so ready to insult another governor. The newspapers
are a lot of bother. I spent all yesterday evening talking to reporters.
They came to the house to ask where papa was and when he would be home!"
"What did you tell them?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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