British -- France -- Fiction; French -- England -- Fiction; Love stories
She was taken up to see Mr. Westmacott, who sat at an open window, a
reading-table before him with books upon it. Sitting there, as formally
courteous as ever, with his tall pale head and eyes still clearly blue,
he did not look so ill. It was more in his voice as he questioned her
about her journey that she felt change. His voice had become dry and
brittle, like a glacial wind fluttering the leaves of an old abandoned
volume that no one would ever read again. He would soon die; Alix felt
sure of that as she heard him. He would die, and Toppie would leave the
Rectory and wander forth desolate, among her doves. Why, oh, why, would
she not see and understand Giles? Why would she not marry him? “Oh, if I
could see her married to Giles,” she thought, when she had said good-bye
to Toppie and was out again upon the common. “If I could only help Giles
so that he should marry her, it would have been worth while that I
should have come to England!” And that there was mistake,
misunderstanding between Giles and Toppie, she was now sure.
She had gone halfway across the dried heather, when, as on the evening
of her first visit to the Rectory, she saw Giles approaching her, Jock
at his heels, and she knew now, as she had then only felt instinctively,
that he had been waiting for her and that he was afraid of something. Of
the same thing; yet of more.
Jock saw her and raced ahead to jump against her knees. He was still her
special pet among the dogs and had received Blaise kindly. Alix stooped
to caress his head while she watched Giles approach her.
“Well, how did you find Toppie?” he asked simply, as they met.—Giles
not true! Giles easily misled! Alix felt herself suddenly blushing with
anger as the thought of Toppie’s strange delusion returned to her. Giles
drew her arm within his and they went across the common towards the
birch-wood. It gave her a deep feeling of consolation that he should
thus seek refuge with the one person who could understand him.
“I find her changed, Giles,” she said.
“In what way changed?” said Giles quickly.
And as quickly Alix answered: “Not at all to me, Giles.”
“You see how desperately ill her father is, don’t you?” said Giles.
“She’s quite worn out with nursing him, you know. In what way do you
feel her changed?” he repeated, looking down into her face.
Alix was pondering. She was not a person who believed in black and
white. She believed in the greys and the in-between shades. She did not
mean to tell Giles how she thought Toppie changed. What she found to say
was: “If Toppie were happier she would not be so hard.”
“Hard?” She was looking at the ground, but she heard in Giles’s voice
how the word startled him.
“Do you not think Toppie hard?” she asked.
“If she is,” said Giles after a moment, “it’s because of what you
say—that she is unhappy.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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