Clergy -- Fiction; Country life -- Scotland -- Fiction; Deception -- Fiction; Romanies -- Fiction; Scotland -- Fiction
"Sometimes," she continued, more gently, "I try to think that my
mother did come back for me, and then went away because she heard
I was in better hands than hers. It was Lord Rintoul who found me,
and I owe everything to him. You will say that he has no need to
be proud of me. He took me home on his horse, and paid his
gardener's wife to rear me. She was Scotch, and that is why I can
speak two languages. It was he, too, who sent me to school in
Edinburgh."
"He has been very kind to you," said Gavin, who would have
preferred to dislike the earl.
"So kind," answered Babbie, "that now he is to marry me. But do
you know why he has done all this?"
Now again she was agitated, and spoke indignantly.
"It is all because I have a pretty face," she said, her bosom
rising and falling. "Men think of nothing else. He had no pity for
the deserted child. I knew that while I was yet on his horse. When
he came to the gardener's afterwards, it was not to give me some
one to love, it was only to look upon what was called my beauty; I
was merely a picture to him, and even the gardener's children knew
it and sought to terrify me by saying, 'You are losing your looks;
the earl will not care for you any more.' Sometimes he brought his
friends to see me, 'because I was such a lovely child,' and if
they did not agree with him on that point he left without kissing
me. Throughout my whole girlhood I was taught nothing but to
please him, and the only way to do that was to be pretty. It was
the only virtue worth striving for; the others were never thought
of when he asked how I was getting on. Once I had fever and nearly
died, yet this knowledge that my face was everything was implanted
in me so that my fear lest he should think me ugly when I
recovered terrified me into hysterics. I dream still that I am in
that fever and all my fears return. He did think me ugly when he
saw me next. I remember the incident so well still. I had run to
him, and he was lifting me up to kiss me when he saw that my face
had changed. 'What a cruel disappointment,' he said, and turned
his back on me. I had given him a child's love until then, but
from that day I was hard and callous."
"And when was it you became beautiful again?" Gavin asked, by no
means in the mind to pay compliments.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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