“It doesn’t matter. I don’t really care anything about it.” The smile
was slightly satirical, this time. “I’d forgotten it was Our Agnes’s
night out!”
Helwise looked upset, and as if she might be getting ready for another
heart-attack.
“I dare say there’s a tin of something somewhere, but I shouldn’t
know what to do with it if there was. You’d much better let me get
the Therm.--_not_ in the office, Lancelot! I meant to have had it all
tidied up before you got back, but Dandy brought another crochet
pattern and that was how I didn’t turn off the gas. What I mean is that
I’ve been hunting through your old papers for accounts of the Lugg
when it was first built. I thought it would be so interesting to have
them pasted in a book now that the thing’s gone altogether, and then
there’ll be all the fresh paragraphs about it, this week. I felt sure
you would like to see them, but there were so many years back to look
through, and the stickphast stuck such lots of other things beside the
right ones. Oh, and do you know, Lancelot, there was a photograph of
your father taken on the top of the Lugg, with his foot on the last
spadeful, and on the right--no, left!--that poor old Whinnerah person
who was drowned? Underneath they’d put: ‘Conqueror of the Sea!’ Don’t
you think that it would be nice to have the photograph reproduced in
this week’s paper, while everybody is so interested? People forget so
soon. There might be a companion one of you, too, don’t you think,
looking at one of the breaks?”
“With my foot on a coffin?” Lanty’s voice, risen a little, had in
it something strange and wild. He stood gazing at her with a fixed
expression on his face, striving to measure the exact immensity of the
gulf between them, seeing her thousand selfish follies climb out of
it like mocking gnomes. He had done all he could for her, not all she
wanted, perhaps, but everything within his power, and at his greatest
need she gave him nothing--no, much worse than nothing--in return. In
this his hour of bitterness she would drag his dead into light, holding
it up to public calumny with a pot of stickphast. He closed the office
door between them, and heard her burst into terrified tears on the
other side.
“It was his father!” she sobbed and gasped, as the girls attempted
to soothe her. “It’s no use telling me it was Lancelot, because he
never looked at me like that in his life. They say the dead come back
sometimes, and stare at you through the children’s eyes, and I’m sure
it’s true! He never liked me--the other. He always said I was silly,
and I was frightened of him. I believe Lancelot is drowned, and this is
his father come back in his place! No, it’s no use talking to me about
eggs and bread-and-butter! If he’s a ghost, how can he eat? I won’t
stay down here--no, I daren’t! He might come out again, and I should
never get over it!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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