Single women -- Fiction; United States -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
wonder if all women care as much for their husbands as I do for mine. Do
you know, dear, I think about you so much. I know that there have been
several hearts in which you have reigned, and yet you have not cared. But
the true love, the right lover, has not come, or you could not have passed
him by. He is waiting for you; somewhere, somehow, he will come to you, I
am sure, and you will know then that you have belonged to each other all
this time; that this love has been coming down the ages from eternity for
just you two. You will not refuse it then. Why, I could never have refused
to marry Frank when I found that I was as much to him as he was to me! He
is so handsome, so good. I shall never cease to thank God that He made him
turn aside into the quiet places to find me. But, in spite of all this,
you know I don't think he is perfect. He doesn't care for books as much
as I wish he did. He has no ear for music, and he cannot tell a story
straight to save his life, the dear boy! Love does not blind my eyes, but
this is what it does do. It makes me overlook in him what would annoy me
in others. When, at that beautiful dinner of Mrs. Osborne's, Frank told
those stories of his that I've heard for years, I don't think any one
cared to hear them except Mr. Beck and me. I knew they were not well told,
but it was my husband who was telling them, and I could listen to his
voice, even if I couldn't sit next him.
"How the wind blows. Don't you think it has a lonesome sound to-night?
There isn't a glimmer of light from any of your windows yet, and see what
a lovely glow this fire casts all through the room. It makes the cold
walls look warm, and if it makes shadows, it chases them away when it
blazes its brightest. It is your fault that there is no light in your
windows, and your fault that you have closed your heart against love. You
could have the glow that lights my house and my heart if you only would.
You know, dear, I am not talking to you as a neighbor now or even as a
friend, but as a woman talks to a woman out of her inmost heart. It is
only because I love you so and because I have seen you with my babies that
I know what a home-maker you are. You seem so sad sometimes, and I know
your heart is wistful if your eyes are not. How can you have the courage
to shut out love? How can you see the happiness of all your friends and
not want a share of it yourself? Why do you cry so, my dear? Is there some
one you love? Has any trouble come between you? No? No? Well, there,
there! It was selfish of me to show you the way I look at things and to
try to make you dissatisfied. Never mind. You are stronger than I. I could
not live without love; I should die. But if you can, it may be that you
are fulfilling your destiny more nobly than many another who has more of
what I should choose.
"Oh, must you go? Forgive me if I have said what I should not. Good-night,
and God bless you, my dear."
XI
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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