The Love Affairs of Lord ByronGribble, Francis Henry
General
The Love Affairs of Lord Byron
Gribble, Francis Henry
Byron, George Gordon Byron, Baron, 1788-1824 -- Relations with women; Poets, English -- 19th century -- Biography
"Count G. has arrived in Venice, and has presented his spouse (who had
preceded him two months for her health and the prescriptions of Dr.
Aglietti) with a paper of conditions, regulations of hours and conduct
and morals, &c., which he insists on her accepting, and she persists
in refusing. I am expressly, it would seem, excluded by this treaty,
as an indispensable preliminary; so that they are in high discussion,
and what the result may be I know not, particularly as they are
consulting friends."
The view of the friends--that is to say of the Italy of the period--was
that morals were of little but appearances of great importance. Married
women might have lovers--one lover at a time--but their amours must be
conducted in their own homes and under their husbands' patronage. By
running away with their lovers they put themselves in the wrong; and the
men who ran away with them showed themselves ignorant of the manners of
good society; so that Countess Belzoni, who knew all about the draper's
wife and the baker's wife and the promiscuous debaucheries of the
Mocenigo Palace, remarked to Moore, who was passing through Venice at the
time: "It is such a pity, you know. Until he did that, he had been
behaving with such perfect propriety."
So the debate proceeded; the girl wife and the sexagenarian husband giving
each other pieces of their several minds, and the friends offering good
advice to both of them, while Byron, who was excluded from the Council
Chamber, sat below and wrote to Murray:
"As I tell you that the Guiccioli business is on the eve of exploding
in one way or the other, I will just add that, without attempting to
influence the decision of the Contessa, a good deal depends upon it.
If she and her husband make it up you will, perhaps, see me in England
sooner than you expect; if not, I shall retire with her to France or
America, change my name, and live a quiet provincial life. All this
may seem odd, but I have got the poor girl into a scrape; and as
neither her birth, nor her rank, nor her connections by birth or
marriage are inferior to my own, I am in honour bound to support her
through: besides, she is a very pretty woman--ask Moore--and not yet
one and twenty."
That, once again, is not the language of a man whom an invincible passion
has swept off his feet. It is the language of the man who lets himself be
loved rather than of the man who loves--the man who will preserve an even
mind whether he retains his mistress or loses her, and whose affection for
her only carries him to the point of saying that, whatever happens, at any
rate he will not treat her badly. It is a point, at any rate, beyond that
to which his affection for Miss Clairmont ever carried him; but it is
hardly the furthest point to which it is possible for love to go.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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