“Since you went away I have found existence so wearisome that I have longed for death to put an end to the sorrows and troubles which, as you know, are many and threaten to overwhelm me. I hope you will not be foolish enough, or brave enough, to get wounded for the sake of seeing me the sooner. I would rather wait a long time than any hurt should befall you, though, believe me, I am so eager to embrace you that I am ill with longing. What you ask kept me awake all night. What would I not give for the thing to be possible on your part! On my part it is easy, but I will say no more about it. We can never tell what the future has in store for us; but this I know—if anything should happen to you I should not survive it. If you had chosen a place to hide me from all the world you could hardly have found a likelier spot than this. It is away from all society, in utter solitude. At any other time I should have found it tiresome, for there is not a soul to speak to, and the people with us are anything but lively; but as I know your wishes it is a positive pleasure to me to be cloistered like this. It would have vexed me to find any man here: you would certainly have jumped to the conclusion that I came to seek him. I have so utterly renounced coquetry that I hate it now as much as I used to love it. I hardly know myself, and cannot understand how any woman can have changed as I have done. As I have told you a thousand times, I think of you only, and count everything else as nothing. “I hope I may not go to Epsdorff; the Prince’s return may prevent me. I shall do all I can to get out of it, for I would not delay a moment the joy I would buy with my blood—to see you once more and to seal with my lips my vows of love. You are admirable about your Duke Frederick Augustus. A fine test you would put me to! I shall be sorry if you place me under an obligation not to look at him, though it is scarcely worth while, for surely you need not fear. You know full well that you are far above them all. You see, I am giving you back all the sweet things you tell me about La Reingrave and Madame Delvassine.