"Half-a-crown, indeed, for a tradesman like you! There's Corney Dolan there, who don't seem to have a coat that fits him too well, would do more for his wife, if it was God's pleasure he was to have one this night." "Well, there;" and Denis put down another half-crown. This money, which is always put down just before the marriage, is a bridal present to the bride, and becomes her exclusive property. "Well, Mary, you must be getting the rest of it from him another time." "Let her alone for that, yer riverence," said Corney Dolan--who considered that Father John's allusion to his coat privileged him to put in his joke--"let her alone for that; she knows how to be getting the halfpence, and to hoult them too." "It's a great deal you're knowing about it, I'm thinking, Mr. Dolan," retorted Denis; "it's a pity you couldn't keep the hoult of any yerself." "Wisht, boys! how am I to marry you at all, if you go on this way? Come, Mary, off with that glove of yours; now for the ring, Denis:" and Mary hauled away at the glove, which the heat of her hand prevented her from pulling off. "Drat it for a glove, then!" "Ah, alanna, gloves come so nathural to your purty hand, they don't like to lave it at all." At last, however, Mary got her hands ready for action; the ring was in the plate with the two half-crowns; Father John was standing between the two matrimonial aspirants; Ussher and Feemy were close behind Mary, and Brady was sitting down on the right hand of Denis; and the priest opened his book and began. The marriage ceremony took about five minutes; but during this time Father John found occasion to whisper Ussher to come up close to the bride; and then, after hurrying over a great part of the service almost under his breath, he pronounced the final words--_salute nostra_--in a loud voice, adding at the same time to Ussher, "Now, my boy!" Ussher, in obedience to the priest's injunction, seized hold of the bride at one side, to kiss her; while McGovery, determined to vindicate his own right, pounced on her on the other; justly thinking that the first kiss she should have after her wedding ought to be given to her by her lawful married husband. But, alas! both aspirants were foiled, and Mary got no kiss at all. She, in her dismay at the energy of the two aspirants, ducked her head down nearly to the level of the table, and Denis, in his zeal and his hurry, struck Ussher in the face with his own forehead with no slight force. The Captain retreated, half-stunned, and not very well pleased with the salute he had received; and Denis was so shocked at what he had done, that he forgot his wife--and, apparently even the pigs and the money--in his regrets and apologies. "Egad, Captain," said Father John, "that's more of a kiss than I meant to get you; why, you're as awkward, McGovery, as a bullcalf. Who'd have thought to see you butting at the Captain, like an old goat on his hind legs!"